poetnw's Journal

Seasonings
Nov 29 2009 07:13

A seasoning in God’s stew:

Canada geese explode the air

black then white

earth bound ears crack open

a feast to be savored

pepper and salt, this late November.

I am grateful for the jacket stories and for the brandy fruitcake story- exactly like making authentic pickles versus hurry up and eat 'em pickles.  Processes.  Life.  There is a heavy orange shreddy zippered sweat shirt hanging in my closet.  It is just a fragment; an unwearable chunk of What Was.  At one point I worked in a Cat Clinic.  The Vet owner decided she could fork over 50 dollar bonuses that year.  It was then that I'd joined OA and a revelation whammed me aside the head: I needed a shorter jacket if I was going to really move around Lake Padden and up and down Chuckanut mountain.  I went to Yeagers- a historical sporting goods store- and got that Carhart jacket.  And now it just stinks of memory.  Can't throw it out.  Its my Skunk jacket; glacier rock and tree roots that tripped me, Mom tossing crackers to Susie dog and me looking out over the San Juans- us having gained a mile ascent and taking a needed rest.   Could go on and on. 

This has been a typical/ atypical Thanksgiving weekend.  I went out to shovel up dog done it from around the garden table, looked over and discovered we still had very edible broccoli growing.  You bet I got a scissors and harvested that.  Ate some last night.  Have more to eat.  I am grateful for that.    We did all the many steps and got the fruitcake made last night.  Hubby kept an eye on how long it needed baking cause by then my brain needed to sleep.  I read  aloud Capote's bitter sweet paen to fruitcake making and childhood and his closeness to his elderly cousin.   Reading this story is the for sure start of Yule season: reading aloud is as much a part of December as snow falling.  Tonight we'll watch The Homecoming.  Sentimental but peace.  We need peace.   I can feel the pull of dysfunction when I talk to my friend.  In a way I wish I had not called her this morning.  She has such a sad and emotionally mean family and in that venue, had Thanksgiving.  Blah.   I called her to invite her to go with us to the Handbell choir performance that I just found out about.  She has her kidney proceedure so won't be able to go.  It looks like the weather will cooperate this coming Saturday so we'll again be able to drive West about 15 miles and attend that concert- might be 12 above but not icy.  Christmas music and held in a small town gym.  Can't be beat for flavor. 

One more blather:  the green and gold starred teapot in the photo is a Hall china pot- made in the 30s or the 40s.  The story behind it: my Mother used to live in a low income apt.  That apt. had a place for folks to put their castoffs when they didn't want them any more.  Mom went down there, found the pot and brought it to me.  I hold it and of course think of her.  She knew me and knew I'd keep it in good order.  Thank you, Mom, and thank you to all who brought stories to the table.  Story is what keeps us alive. 

Nada
Nov 27 2009 05:35

I did not get up in the dead of night and go stand in line with a pack of others.  I did not and am not buying an electronic gizmo or a bubble coat- well meaning busy body friend wants me to go buy a bubble coat at Wallies cause it is cheap and my present jacket/coat looks filthy no matter what I do to it.  This black streaked jacket also is down and its zipper still works.  So to my mind, friend can shut up and I can stay warm.  She finally admitted the bubble jacket is not down though it is cheap.  I'm part of a partnership that is paying off a house, not buying jackets and electronic gizmos.   Crazy world out there.

Finally.  Finally NPR had a small report on the hell that is reality for disabled folks looking for work.  Guess now the goverment doesn't have the cash to fork over to educate the disabled.  The hubster was lucky he got his Master's paid for, I guess.  He also does a job where his co-workers mostly have a Batchelor's Degree- he had to have a Master's Degree to get work.  Discrimination up yours. 

The difference in philosophy/ on living life.  Not sure why I didn't squawk at friend yesterday.  She sure had a fine time telling me how I was her "pioneer friend" and ha ha stuff like that- she was bringing a Schwans pie to her family gathering.  I was and am delighted with my feast- wow it was tasty.  I loved how the artichoke- looked like tulip bulbs- and fennel and green beans blended together.  Mild but tasty.  Also had roast turkey and stuffing and of course black olives and cran/raspberry canned sauce.  And that crazy oh so wow! pecan pie- like eating the inside of chocolates.  Way too gooey.  Ha ha.

And then the catmint tea.  What is catmint?  Trying to figure an answer.  A friend looked at the clump growing out front one summer and mistook it for lavender- light blue/lavender flowers on both.  The catmint has gray green soft mouse ear leaves and tiny flowers.  Not cat nip though my plant nursery friend says it is.  No.  Nepeta is its latin name.  Cats do love it.  Not sure if this explains it.  Very nice for tea- scissor off some clumps and poke it in the pot.

I probably should have taken a photo of the feast table.  I put out the Bavarian covered vegetable dish; love its gold trim and soft blue flowers and had the Bavarian small teapot and Depression era pink shamrock glass dish for the olives and the English thistle cup and saucers.  Wedgewood gold and white plates to eat from.  Vintage dinnerware often has texture.  A 3rd dimension feel as well as a floral motif and the gleam of gold on the rims.  Summer at autumn feast time.   Memories and spirits sat with us: that pie made of nuts given to us from a sister and my Mom; Illinois and Missouri.  The artichokes gleaned from a garden hubby made a point of making one summer. 

Two medium walks.  Rain.  No ice.  I am grateful for no ice.  Today we start preparing for fruitcake making.  We'll gather together old apples and make a cup of cider and marinate the dried fruits and nuts in that tonight.  Will make the cake tomorrow- need to grind wheat into flour, too.  Fruitcake making is a process, like making pickles.  Life is a process.  You don't just go from gigantic to slim and muscled in a single leap!   Got to keep reminding me of that. 

Oh and this coming week it will be time to get on with labeling envelopes and putting the final touches on the Christmas stories.  Almost time to mail them.  The Christmas story turned out well this year. 

I Got you Babe
Nov 25 2009 13:27

That song popped into my head earlier.  Good old vintage Sonny and Cher.  Riding around in the back seat of my brother's car in Mpls.  Must have been maybe 10 yrs old.  

I started the money (morning) by wading into the credit union chat line- ha ha- sour folks- got daughter's last car payment paid plus the late fee.  Crunch goes our account.  The good part of the day:  digging up Jerusulem artichokes and little onions from the garden and spying good looking catmint: yum tea tomorrow!  Felt like a pioneer, scouting for feast ingredients.  So we will not buy store spuds.  Will sub chokes.  Did buy fennel and store green beans.  And bread from the bread store.  Sure had a hard frost last night. 

I am tired.  Just not sleeping well though I am sleeping harder cause I need the rest so darned bad.  Am going to go face the empty bowls and make pie crust and then pecan pie filling.  Nope.  This set of bones does not need to go any where near this insanely tasty concoction.  While I was out today I bought honey from the honey factory for the pie and for the fruit cake that we'll make this coming weekend.  That fruitcake is a work of art by the time we get 'er done.  Takes forever.  The fruit marinates in the apple cider over night- and we buy real dried fruit, not the messed with glazed stuff.  We also dry some fruit so its the real deal all the way round.  Brazil and almond nuts, too.   'Nuff food porn!

I hope whoever bothers to read this ramble has a happy holiday- even if you ignore it, enjoy the day.  My niece does not like Thanksgiving food so she goes to a friends and basically has a Non-Thanksgiving day.  Just enjoy your family and loved ones.  Be grateful you have them. 

filtered
Nov 24 2009 05:54

I continue to wrap my brain around how daughter has gotten help.  Not my choice of folks to ask for help from.  The fact is that they gave her and interesting roommate help and kept them from harm.  And one of the folks allows them to camp in their backyard due to the shelters being full.  Daughter says she was not aware she had another power bill to pay and that it landed on our doorstep.  She loves it in Arizona; loves the library and food co-op etc.  I miss food co-ops.  The closest thing we have is the health food store in Wenatchee.  I detest health food stores that mainly push pills.  The one in W. is mostly good food and has fridge sections, too.  And most prices for those that have a little cash.  That part is not so sweet.  I hate it that Good Food is more for the Have Its.      

 Reminds me of what happened last Sunday: hubby did a lesson on levers with friend's grandson.  He showed the boy how much easier it was to raise a concrete block with a 2-by 4 then to pick it up.  Then he got around to cracking nuts with a nut cracker.  Hubby said the boy had not been aware that inside a pecan shell was good tasty food.  He'd thought nuts were just something you threw out to the birds.  These pecans may look a tad different than what he might have seen at the store cause they are not polished. 

Oh goody: just spotted a female finch at the feeder.  As I've written before, we mostly get fat sparrows at the feeder.  Aggressive little buggers.   This is maybe the 2nd or 3rd finch that I've seen.   Whoops.  Sonny just jumped at the glass so no more birds.  He came to me today and rubbed on me until I wiped his eyes cleaner.  Not a dumb guy, that's for sure. 

Morning sunshine.  I am grateful for that this morning.  Love the shadows that the sun creates on the house walls.  I love shadows.  Like paper cut outs. 

urban legends
Nov 23 2009 11:36

In another life I attended a class on urban folk legends.  Found it fascinating.  One urban legend that we run into every Thanksgiving is the rumor that there are folks that don't have anywhere to go for the holiday and would appreciate a place to go.  They hide when we ask around.  

So it will be me, hubby, four fur persons, a 23 pound turkey, stuffing, mint tea, probably cranberry and black olives and possibly a fruit salad that includes cherries from the freezer, an unknown vegetable and can't forget hubby's mashed spuds and my pecan pie.  Maybe I'll buy some spinach and make a simple salad from that.  The pecan pie will be made of pecans given to us from a sister and honey from a local honey factory plus eggs and butter. 

We are hearing from daughter.  She says she was not aware that such entities as the power bill and car payment bills would come to us.  She says she sent the car payment folks a money order.  She says she has been helped out and is being helped out by a loving community and is actively working on apps for telemarketing firms and has passed one such firm's first test well.   So it is time for me to quit worrying.  She sounds like she is doing her best to make a go of it.  I am grateful that daughter has economic woes but is NOT a druggie. 

We had a dusting of snow Saturday night.  It went that a way right after the morning came on and warmed the world.   And my Mother's birthday is today.  Her turning 88 makes me an official old fogey.  I admit to envying my sister- she just turned 60 and had my Mom there with her.  I very much doubt my Mother will be with me when I turn 60.  My oldest brother is visiting Mom so she is having a good day, I am sure. 

Miasma
Nov 20 2009 13:36

Couldn't think of a title.  Liked the word so it went on the marquee.

Raining. Cloudy.  BUT above freezing temps so I am content cause I'm not sitting under a leaky roof.  I've plunked Big Ugly squash meat into the blender and have plans of heating it with a bit of curry powder and green olive juice- salty- soup.  And have salmon with lemon marinade waiting to heat.  Got to come up with something green to go with this and then supper will on the table when hubby gets home. 

Don't want- not going to- talk about daughter.  Not right now.  Thinking about where did I put that cat toy insert?!  And wondering whether we're going to Wenatchee tomorrow.  I used to drive in the rain all the time.  If the roads are not frozen, should be fine.  I would not think snow would be on the roads in W. if the temps are above the low 30s- its north of us so all these factors come to mind.   Sillly me wants to go see if their teeny mall has Christmas displays up. Way too early to think about this except it will be our very last chance so am going ahead with it.  I'd love to find those old fashioned maple sugar Santas. Have not seen them in years.  And mollasses peppermints.  Miss that stuff.  Miss the idiotic glitter. Window shopping can be fun. 

I've said it before. I repeat it here: I am grateful for all that I take for granted. I am grateful for stuff so familiar I no longer really see it.

behind door no. 2 is
Nov 19 2009 08:42

You got it.  A daughter who would have what? Now?  I hope this mess is not building a bridge that no one will be able to climb over.  So my options were to ignore the phone call and to leave her stranded in a tire store parking lot.  What kind of ogre/Mother could do that?!  Yup. They don't know Tucson and went down the wrong way on a street so they dove into a parking lot to turn the right way- parking lot entrance had those dealies on it that kill tires if you drive the wrong way on them.   I swear demons are after her and room mate.  My house was the only place that would not turn her away.  Per usual, I was pretty tired when I got up- 7 a.m. phone call was not pleasant.  Then hubby got on the phone and really started the fire works.  Said he was not sorry about it, either.  He is stressed/strained/sad about this mess let alone all of the above with the stuff/folks he deals with at work.     So cause of the economic situation, the tire store could not take my credit card info over the phone.  Had to have it faxed.  Heh.  That got me dressed and driving around and being pe-oed at whatever dared to breathe.  Finally got the mess cleared up- have not had a final call from the tire store but will before the day is out.      I went home to beat up some butter and sugar and squash to make cookies- not the smartest thing but so tasty.  Did put some oat flour in.   Heh there too.

I caved and signed up for AARP yesterday- over 50 so I am a senior!!!!  I did this cause we will save a nice amount of change on car insurance.  Lovely to get that bill reduced.  I am not comfortable dealing with numbers but I am the one home so I get to do it.  Might as well pay my way a bit, reducing bills. 

I am grateful that we do have a little to help daughter with.  I hate it that we are the Parent Bank.  I am grateful that daughter made it in one piece over the mountain passes and is now looking for the Y or whereever to get a shower so that she can go talk to telemarketer firms about work. 

Chaos and spinning my wheels
Nov 18 2009 09:35

I am grateful I have the time to sit and crack pecans.  We got to talking again about what will be on the Thanksgiving menu and hubby for sure said pecan pie!  Pecans are expensive.  Plus especially for Thanksgiving we like to put things on the menu not directly from the store.  So I got to looking at a messy kitchen shelf and realized again how I have taken for granted a bag of unshelled pecans that a sister gave me- a souvenir of Illinois.  Solution right there.  Next week I'll go to the honey factory and buy a little honey for the pie- sub that for corn syrup.  Not sure if I have seen a blooming pecan tree.  The shells are humble yet pretty.  Light brown with darker flecks. Slim.  A pain to crack- I finally dug out an old wooden handled slim knife so that I could pry the stubborn bits out.  The almond tree that we used to have bloomed gorgeous pink blooms each Spring.  Loved that tree.     I heated up cherries from the freezer for hubby's breakfast fruit this morning.  We had home red spuds at supper last night- trying to clear the freezer out a bit.

Thinking about the many news reports on more hungry Americans. Frightening. Plus I know the animal companions are hurting more due to their humans not having food for anyone.  My friend's daughter reported that when she moved into this latest house, they found an empty house next door and a left behind dog.  Somebody called the police and dog went somewhere.  Have not heard from daughter for a couple of days now.  I did talk to another sister last night. I don't deal with shame.  I threw that stuff out a long time ago.  She asked how daughter was doing and I told her.  Sister then said that a neighbor of hers said that neighbor can not afford to pay for her house any longer and is unsure what she is going to do.  You bet I am grateful that hubby still has his work position.  Our governor is talking about debt and cutting back on programs.  Hubby has a meeting today about something.  He for sure is feeling the strain.

My oldest brother drove over to be with my Mom for her birthday and the upcoming holiday.  I am glad he can still do that.  He is a Vietnam Vet and I think some of that is taking its toll on him. Aging is so much fun.  Ha ha. 

I am grateful for the small rituals.  I will bake a Big Ugly squash today.  Probably make a squash pie from some of it tomorrow or the day after and just have some tonight instead of white spuds.  I am grateful I still am able to listen to my inner voice.

Okra Windbag
Nov 17 2009 05:39

Had to write that.  I needed a cheap laugh- no, I won't vote for her if she goes for the presidency.  Two more paragraphs.  Story again finished.  Ha.

I was able to help my Mom long distance.  She had a cold and then got into the itchy throat/ can't stop coughing syndrome.  I suggested Mucinex.  She had my sister find her some.  Later I got an e-mail:  Relief!!  Sweet relief. 

I caved.  Via Paypal, I sent daughter 25.00.  My pagan daughter begging, church to church, for gas money.  The lady who talked daughter and house mate into moving to the wilds of Nevada had a financial upset and is not able to give the money she owes.  Daughter and Roomie are headed to Arizona. Supposedly there is work there- at least telemarketing yippee work.  Supposedly they will head back to Nevada in the Spring.  I told my Mom this latest Gads!! and she said it reminded her of that- couldn't come up with the name- her first husband- they begged from the Salvation Army.  I said yes, the economy right now is very like the Depression.  Down right scary.  For the first time hubby and I are floating above the bottom.  Our state governor says she needs to cut more programs so maybe she'll wring a little more from the state health program and other such needy places.  Crazy world.

Friend did show up.  We took her preggers daughter on our latest crazy trip.  Between us all, we got the garden window tied into friend's trunk and we figured a way to get it back to my house without travelling on the highway.  Now we're talking/arguing over where it might go- will have to line up a needy capable handyman to help out this Spring.  Not easy to find a needy capable handyman. 

We could get 40 miles an hour wind gusts today.  Warmer, though. I am grateful for the warmer temps.  I am grateful Story still nails me.  I am grateful my hands/wrists/fingers feel a bit better this morning.