sonjahorn1's Journal

I feel like a failure, but I'm back

Jul 09 2009 13:48

I thought I was doing so well and then for one week I quit logging foods and then one week turns to 2 and 2 turns to 3 and then I look down and it is several months later, I havent' logged anything, I'm not exercising and I'm back to my poor eating habits, not to mention putting back all of the weight I've lost.

So, here I am again. I'm going to really try...again...maybe this journal will help. I'm in the office more, so I should be able to log things more effectively than I have before. I can't look at it as 50 pounds to lose...I have to look at it as making better decisions on a daily basis, one day at a time.

I'm sick of being fat, but I'm sick of worrying about it too.

How do people do it?

Oct 13 2008 10:55

I sit here and I read these posts about people running 6 miles and getting ready to run marathons and exercising for an hour or more a day. How do they do it? I hardly find time to get everything that has to be done finished every day, let alone work in enough time to walk for 30 minutes. Where do you find the time? I am a pretty good organizer and my family helps out a lot...but I have a demanding job, I commute an hour and a half back and forth to work every day, I travel a lot, and I play chaffuer for my kids four days a week! ARGHHH...am I the only one who feels guilty about not doing enough exercise? It is hard enough to eat right every single day and then I don't see any change on the scale - at all - and I wonder...is it worth it?

Mighty Frustrating!

Oct 10 2008 09:29

We had to get a new scale this week - the trusty digital broke. Little did I know the crappy digital hadn't been working correctly...ever. So, when I got on the scale this morning for the weekly weigh-in, it was disappointing to see a weight GAIN - not loss. ARGHHH. Hopefully, now, though, we won't have buy a new one and we'll be good to go. I knew it was too good to be true.

I guess now I find out what I'm really made of. It is easy to keep on counting calories and watching every bite I take when I know I'm making progress and headed in the right direction. But...when I do those things and see a 4 pound weight gain - I have to really dig deep to motivate myself to continue. Two years seems FOREVER away to reach my goal. And it seems like it is getting farther and farther away every day.

I will admit, though, that I did not use CC this week like I should. I tried to rely on myself (like after 2 weeks I know how many calories are in every food I eat?) and look what it got me. I also tried the easy way out and instead of fruits and vegetables (which I have to prepare ahead of time), I was snacking on alot of the "100 calorie packs" - which are great in a pinch, but now I realize shouldn't be used all the time!

I guess we learn the hard, huh? So...I'm digging deep and will work my tail off this week and see what happens next Friday...

Weighing in on Fridays

Oct 03 2008 08:48

Second weigh in was not quite as successful as the first (only 3 pounds lost), but it was still a great feeling. I am excited that we have maintained our lifestyle change for two full weeks! And have seen a difference. Yesterday, I really felt like I wasn't going to see a change, so I was glad that there was.

It is getting harder to excercise at this point. I just don't want to walk anymore. I have so many other things I could be doing. It seems like I have to force myself. I usually feel better after I do walk, though. I think that will be what I work on this week...making walking more enjoyable!

Anyway, I consider it another successful week. I feel better. PMS symptoms were much lighter than normal (wohoo) and my skin looks better. All positive things.

Hard to eat right over the weekend

Sep 29 2008 10:22

I find it most difficult to eat healthy when I am at home on the weekend. I know all of the reasons, but that doesn't make it any easier! It seems like the day just drags on and sometimes I find myself obsessing about what I can eat and when. It is so much easier to just grab something fast rather than take the time to plan meals out on the weekend.

I think we did ok this weekend, but not as good as we could have been. The scale will tell the true story on Friday.

I just wish I had some way to make the weekend eating more routine.

First Weigh In

Sep 26 2008 08:42

I am only weighing myself once a week. On previous diets, I would weigh nearly everytime I went in the bathroom where the scale was and would be either ecstatic or depressed depending on what the scale said. This time - not a diet, but a lifesytle change - I am only weighing myself once a week just to make sure I'm on the right track. I want to use how I feel and how I look more of a gauge than the actual numbers on the scale.

Well...I feel great. I do have a lot more energy. I am not hungry, like I thought I would be. I think that drinking so much water has really helped. And snacking on healthy foods throughout the day has made it so much easier to stay on target. I don't think I look any different - except maybe I'm smiling more because I feel so much better!

Weigh in was this morning - right before the am shower...and I had lost five pounds! OK...so, the scale still has the ability to make me ecstatic...that is more encouragement than I could have hoped for.

I'm just going to continue one day at a time. I love CC. It has helped me so much. It is like a game almost. It has made counting my calories fun (if that is even possible). And to anyone out there who is frustrated - just hang in there. One day at a time!

Weekend's Over

Sep 22 2008 13:10

Well, the weekend is over and it is back to the daily grind. Sometimes I find it much easier to eat healthy when I'm at work. I don't spend the day wondering when my next meal is and I have so much on my mind that I often forget to eat at all.

I feel like the weekend was successful. I stayed within my calorie range - even though we went to an amusement park. I packed plenty of carrots and celery in my fanny pack!

The hardest part is going to be staying motivated for the long haul. Although, I am very excited about losing weight and being healthy. My goal seems like forever away, but I'm looking at it in baby steps. Just one day at a time.

First Day

Sep 20 2008 19:39

Today is the first day of our "lifestyle change." I refuse to call it a diet because that will make it too easy to quit - and quitting is not an option.

We both (my husband and I) were succesful today with our eating and exercising, which is surprising since it is a weekend. Normally, when watching college football on the weekends all we do is eat.

This is the first thing I have been excited about in a long time and hope that we can both continue. It is very hard to do on my own, but I've enlisted the help of many of my friends to help hold me accountable. I am looking forward to renewed energy and my kids not being embarassed to invite their friends over!