tiredofbeingthebiggirl's Journal

Cravings, Twins, and More

Nov 15 2009 12:54

I had my first ultrasound on Thursday. My doctor thought he saw twins. We went for a better ultrasound at a diagnostic imaging place and there is just one baby and a small fibroid. My doctor doesn't think the fibroid is anything to be concerned about. The baby's heartrate was a healthy 144 beats per minute. It was awesome to see our baby on the ultrasound. My husband and I were so excited. Twins would have been a special blessing, but I'm very happy to be the expectant mother of one.

My cheeseburger cravings have subsided, fortunately. I have picked up a small amount of weight but the doctor and I attribute it to the extreme case of constipation I am battling. Sorry friends, TMI. My belly is just starting to show and being the excited first time mother, I am already wearing maternity clothes. I wouldn't have to, but this could be the only time I am ever pregnant, so I'm going to enjoy it.

I feel good, I just require more sleep than I did before.

It's Been Awhile

Sep 13 2009 16:37

I've not been on in quite some time. My husband and I have decided to start trying to conceive, so my mind has been occupied. I actually thought I might have been pregnant until Wednesday, so I've been on an emotional roller coaster.

My eating has been not so good. I'm back on track today, trying to do the best I can. Biggest Loser starts this week!!! I'm psyched!

I need to get my weight down as low as I can to up our chances of conceiving. I'm focusing on eating good, quality food with lots of fruits and veggies. I'm also trying to get more sleep.

Good news on my caffeine addiction. I've kicked my Diet Mountain Dew habit. I stopped a couple of weeks ago when I just had that hunch that I might be pregnant. Now I don't even want one. I know getting rid of all those chemicals is good for me in all aspects of my life.

I really hope to have a great food/exercise week this week. Fingers are crossed, prayers are being murmurmed.

I was able to accomplish so much; I know I can again.

Getting Closer to Lowest Weight

Aug 22 2009 14:24

Scale said 238.4 this morning, 5.8 pounds more than my lowest. If I stay on track, I have a feeling I could be at 232 by next Saturday morning.

Settling In

Aug 20 2009 18:10

I am starting to feel much more settled into my job. I have actually enjoyed this week very much and it has flown by!!! I love going into different classrooms to teach reading and writing. I'm still having a little trouble getting my small groups lined out, but I know it will happen.

My weight had actually been up by as much as 18 pounds! Last week, after I ate and while I was having my period, I saw as high as 250. (Clothes on, middle of the day...still...not good) I have fluctuated all summer, but this week, I am down to 239.8. Not terribly happy with it, but it looks a lot better than that 250 did last week! I don't know why I have such great fluctuations, but I do. I try to take it in stride and look at the trend.

My summer low was 234. I was at 232 in April, 242 at the end of May, then back to 234 by the end of June. Enter all the dental work and I started the school year around 240. So here I am, trying to get it all off.

I know I've been claiming to have been maintaining, which I do consider staying within 10 pounds of my lowest to be a type of maintaining. What I have eaten the day before seems to make a HUGE difference in the number I see on the scale.

Anyway, I'm making good choices and I feel wonderful, so I am trying not to stress. I think getting more settled into my job is helping me in the eating department. Last week I couldn't get enough chocolate!!! I'm feeling much more in control this week.

Insecurities

Aug 13 2009 22:52

It's been a tough week. I've been constantly worried about what my colleagues that are still in a normal classroom setting are thinking about me doing something different. I wonder if I am working hard enough, because everything is still new and I'm learning. I feel guilty for actually taking time to eat lunch and getting to go to the bathroom whenever I want. My days in the regular classroom were incredibly rushed. I'm seeing students in small groups and modeling best practice in instruction in regular classrooms. It is more pleasant in regard to my personal comfort.

I've had to fight the urge to eat all week long! The change in my job has triggered stress and I'm railing against old habits.

I walked five miles today after school and that seemed to really help me. I've got to make it a habit, just like I did last school year. The weight loss support group at my school is getting organized again, so that helps.

I've stayed on track foodwise today as well. 30th birthday is just 110 days away. I've got a goal to meet!

Back on Track, Day 1

Aug 08 2009 23:06

I ate within my calorie target, logged all my food, and walked four miles today. It feels really good to be back on track.

New School Year

Aug 05 2009 18:35

Started my first day of school today...it is very different not having a regular classroom, but I will adjust. There were a few perks. I went up the street to pick up a takeout salad for lunch and I could go to the office to get a cup of coffee without asking someone to watch my kids.

Still maintaining my weight...not losing...but maintaining beats gaining.

I am having problems getting back to regular exercise. Think I'll get back into yoga first, just to decompress after the school day.

Almost Back to Myself

Jul 24 2009 23:39

I am feeling so much better today. I had my hair done and did a little shopping. I still have my stitches and can't eat everything that I would like to, but I am progressing in that aspect. Can't wait until I can eat a salad again! I've been eating a lot of beans because they "mush" up easily. You would think I wouldn't have problems with constipation, TMI, but I do. Mama says it is the pain medicine. I have only taken one of the prescription pain relievers today! Yay! I continue to take the prescription strength ibuprofen because it helps so much with the inflammation and swelling.

I really want to get back to walking! The weather here has been terrific, very cool and breezy. I hate that I have missed out on so many great walking days.

As we start another school year, I stand in awe of how far I have come. Last year, I started school in size 22/24! This year, 16 (still a few 18s). Last year my tops were plus sizes 2X and 3X. This year, a loose XL. I feel like a brand new person. I am healthier, I am stronger, my skin looks better, my hair looks better...I could go on and on! I'm learning that this is not bragging, it is being proud for the right reasons!

Still need to drop 30 before 30!!! I know I can do this!

I look like a chipmunk!!!

Jul 23 2009 15:55

I had my surgery and I am feeling better, finally, today! I have been very swollen but the pain has been manageable with the pain medicine. My mother was so good to help take care of me. We had to do ice on, ice off for the first 24 hours, 20 minutes at a time. I'm mostly just hungry, sore, and swollen. I'm going to try some solid food this afternoon. I need protein. Hope everyone is having a good week. I go back to work on Monday.

Ready for Surgery

Jul 18 2009 00:48

I had my surgical consultation today. He seems so kind and caring. Loved the office atmosphere. He does lots of cosmetic work as well and the office seemed kind of like a spa. Wish they would give me a facial after they extract my rogue wisdom teeth!

Thanks to the kind thoughts and prayers of my friends, family, and online friends, I have suffered with much less pain this week. I have pressure and occasional pain, but it's not been the kind of pain that keeps me from doing other things this week. I was actually able to get my classroom ready for the move to my little office area.

I have surgery on Monday morning. I'm hoping that my weight will stay right around 232. I've been up a little and then down a little all summer. I really want to get to 199 by my 30th birthday. I'm thinking I might eventually want to get down to 180 or even 170, but busting through 200 pounds is my biggest goal.

My eating has been sporadic and a little out of control. I've been eating things I normally wouldn't eat because they are soft and easy to chew. Not only that, but I've been eating things that are comforting. I've got to confront that as I gear up for a new school year.

I know that I will not meet my goal of getting below 200 pounds by August 5. Could I possibly get to 220? Maybe, but I doubt it. I'll just have to see how things go with exercise. I'd like to be back to regular activity by Thursday, fingers crossed.

Have a great weekend. Tomorrow's high here in Kentucky is forecast to be in the low 70s. Wow! Great September/October weather in July!!!