Chelle 42 yr old Pagan Witch, mom of 4, living in the MidWest
willowraven's Journal
MnenosyneFeb 15 2007 10:06
Warning: this post will cover some of my personal beliefs which I understand may not be shared or understood with others. That is ok. They are my beliefs and I am not trying to force them on anyone else. Just writing to get it out there to maybe help myself understand.
For the last 3 days, this particular goddess (Mnenosyne) has been showing up. She is the goddess of memory, and one of the Nine Muses. I think it is quite interesting, as I have been exploring past lives and reincarnation as a personal 'research' project, as I am really wanting to remember my past lives. In the last week I have also had some very strange, vivid, very lifelike dreams that have been all over the board - one was a fairly modern-time dream, another was during ancient times, another was 'otherworldly'... and I wake up wondering if they are really just dreams, or if somehow my request to the Universe to help me remember my past lives is being answered. Also, one of my matron goddesses is Cybele (also spelled Kybele) and I have been doing some more research on her and have been intrigued and surprised about some of the things I have discovered. I am also finding out information about Kubaba, which is the goddess she 'came' from before being known as Cybele/Kybele. Anyways....
I went to the doctor on the 12th - very thorough examination (including the annual GYN exam) and I have to say that I am quite pleased with him. He took all my questions and concerns quite seriously, didn't blow me off. I told him about the symptoms I am having and the difficulty with losing weight, and even brought print-outs of my logs (food, activity, weight) to show him. He even said that I am showing 'classic symptoms' for hypothyroidism. He ordered up bloodwork (for that and a few other concerns) and he wants to see me in 2 weeks to discuss JUST the weight loss issues, including the thyroid concerns and, if necessary, refer me to a nutritionist. Usually they allot 15 minutes per appointment, and he said to put me in a 30 minute block for the appointment on the 26th. I am very happy to have a doctor that really listens. My husband went in with me and he was happy as well. He also checked my legs because they tend to change color (normal pink color to sometimes a purple color) - the doctor said that it's most likely a circulation problem and mentioned Renaud's Syndrome, which can have a variety of reasons for why it occurs. He also said he noticed a spot on the edge of my cervix that was a little darker, but couldn't tell if it was the natural darkening of the muscles in that area, or something to be concerned about, so he did the whole PAP thing too, so something else to worry about. ::sigh:: So anyways... I'm now in a "hurry up and wait" mode for the bloodwork results and the 26th appointment.
I'm working on getting back on my food, water and exercise plans. I got in 6 waters yesterday (woot! improvement from the almost NO water I was doing for the last week or so) ... and my food yesterday was around 1800 cals, so again, doing good. Just don't understand why I showed a gain of 3 lbs when I stepped on the scale today? No matter... drinking my water now and going to try to get in 8-10 today. Baby steps to get back. We haven't had the extra $$ for the gas to get to the gym (so this sucks big time) so I know I'm gonna have to do a little backtracking when I'm able to get back there.
The word for today is:
Hope you all have a wonderful day today!!
For the last 3 days, this particular goddess (Mnenosyne) has been showing up. She is the goddess of memory, and one of the Nine Muses. I think it is quite interesting, as I have been exploring past lives and reincarnation as a personal 'research' project, as I am really wanting to remember my past lives. In the last week I have also had some very strange, vivid, very lifelike dreams that have been all over the board - one was a fairly modern-time dream, another was during ancient times, another was 'otherworldly'... and I wake up wondering if they are really just dreams, or if somehow my request to the Universe to help me remember my past lives is being answered. Also, one of my matron goddesses is Cybele (also spelled Kybele) and I have been doing some more research on her and have been intrigued and surprised about some of the things I have discovered. I am also finding out information about Kubaba, which is the goddess she 'came' from before being known as Cybele/Kybele. Anyways....
I went to the doctor on the 12th - very thorough examination (including the annual GYN exam) and I have to say that I am quite pleased with him. He took all my questions and concerns quite seriously, didn't blow me off. I told him about the symptoms I am having and the difficulty with losing weight, and even brought print-outs of my logs (food, activity, weight) to show him. He even said that I am showing 'classic symptoms' for hypothyroidism. He ordered up bloodwork (for that and a few other concerns) and he wants to see me in 2 weeks to discuss JUST the weight loss issues, including the thyroid concerns and, if necessary, refer me to a nutritionist. Usually they allot 15 minutes per appointment, and he said to put me in a 30 minute block for the appointment on the 26th. I am very happy to have a doctor that really listens. My husband went in with me and he was happy as well. He also checked my legs because they tend to change color (normal pink color to sometimes a purple color) - the doctor said that it's most likely a circulation problem and mentioned Renaud's Syndrome, which can have a variety of reasons for why it occurs. He also said he noticed a spot on the edge of my cervix that was a little darker, but couldn't tell if it was the natural darkening of the muscles in that area, or something to be concerned about, so he did the whole PAP thing too, so something else to worry about. ::sigh:: So anyways... I'm now in a "hurry up and wait" mode for the bloodwork results and the 26th appointment.
I'm working on getting back on my food, water and exercise plans. I got in 6 waters yesterday (woot! improvement from the almost NO water I was doing for the last week or so) ... and my food yesterday was around 1800 cals, so again, doing good. Just don't understand why I showed a gain of 3 lbs when I stepped on the scale today? No matter... drinking my water now and going to try to get in 8-10 today. Baby steps to get back. We haven't had the extra $$ for the gas to get to the gym (so this sucks big time) so I know I'm gonna have to do a little backtracking when I'm able to get back there.
The word for today is:
Hope you all have a wonderful day today!!
Im glad you have such a good doctor! and congrats on getting your waters and stuff yesterday =D As for the rest of the stuff.. I dont know much about it, but you sure seem to know what your talking about.. Im sure things will make sense for you soon :-) |
would love to hear more about your research. for real. i am hypo too, but i think i told you that. know this: getting on meds doesnt necessarily equate to getting the right dosage. i hope you have much better luck with that than me. the syptoms can continue with meds if dose is off. oof! is been frustrating for me. i just went thru a LEEP procedure. hope you dont have to. i also had an abnormal pap and a cryo procedure after i had kyle, er...almost 20 years ago so this was my 2nd time. i bet you bod was just thirsty and clinging to the water. its just water. no worries. |
Your research intriges me! I just had a breast reduction last week and I know what baby steps are like. I don't want to gain any wait because I can't exercise for a few weeks. and I have been pampered the past little while and eating bad things. I need more water and better eating habits too. Monday I am back on track for the eating and drinking of water. Glad you have an understanding doctor. That is a big help. Don't worry------I am a firm believer that worry makes us sick and there is nothing we can do but wait for the results. Easier said than done----but try not to worry! |
sorry for the spelling errors in the above message. |
You are a fasinating person. I would love to hear more of your thoughts too. |
I would agree that it prbly was hydration reasons for your apparent gain today. I say apparent cuz we all know scales are fickle little monkeys and they don't always show you exactly what's going on. Keeping on the water is tough. Before my lifestyle change I NEVER drank water. Over the past year I've increased that greatly. Even since I started a concerted effort to lose weight, I used to struggle to get in my "8 cups a day". Just in the past week I've bounced it up to double that. I try and get at least 4 litres in but some days it's a real fight. Keep at it! That scale will be back on your side soon. :) |
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