willowraven's Friends

Boosting her self-esteem was what prompted Cellotlhicks to lose weight. Along the way, she learned many things about the importance of mental discipline. After losing 35 lbs she not only looks better, she feels better as well!

She contacted us through our Share Your Story feature, and provided the following answers to our questionnaire.

1. What made you decide to lose weight this time?

I have struggled with the same 50 lbs or so since I was about 13. A few years back I managed to lose those 50 lbs and was in excellent shape. I taught fitness, had a six pack and wore a size 2-4. A depressing summer, and a more sedentary life in grad school coupled with bad food choices caused me to put on 49 lbs from my low weight. I hated feeling like a failure. I was very low on myself and I am sure I was making things miserable for those around me. I decided to turn it over to God, prayed about it, and stumbled upon this site a few days later. I knew right away that tracking my food was exactly what I needed. Exercise was not my problem as much as food was.

2. What other "diets" (programs, products, plans, or services) had you tried in the past?

I grew up in Tae Kwon Do (received my black belt at 14), and was in ROTC in high school. I credit those two things with giving me lots of discipline and a high tolerance for exercise. In the past when I did lose weight, it was through eating less and moving more, but I never had tools to track it.

3. What changes did you make to your usual diet, activity, lifestyle, and attitude?

My attitude was number one. I had to realize that the guilt, low self esteem and self sabotage were taking deep root and affecting my daily choices. That beating myself down was not producing weight loss. I never called myself fat again after starting this. I put my energy into coming up with different plans and goals, and got excited about them. I would set goals, like 3 days of weights and walk 20 miles this week, and would reward myself when I did that.

4. How did Calorie Count help you to lose weight?

The supportive community has given me a wealth of knowledge. I love my friends here. they are almost better than my real life ones. Writing in my journals has been therapeutic, and reading them over helps me to see how far I have come.  The analysis and other tools have helped me to learn to make much better food choices.

5. What was most challenging about losing weight?

In the beginning, I was shocked at what I was eating, and had to spend lots of time reviewing my choices and reading labels. That has become more second nature now. Also, I hurt my hip and knee, so I have not run in while. I really miss that. Aside from weights and occasionally the elliptical, I can only walk.

6. How long did it take you to see results?

I did not weigh in for a month. Instead of focusing on results right away, I wanted to focus on my mindset and habits, and not allow the scale to control my mood. But I did lose 8 lbs when I weighed myself later, and about 1 month after that I had lost 20 lbs and was halfway to my goal. I'd say that was the moment.

7. When did you realize that you were a success?

There have been many different moments where I have been proud of myself. For example, earlier this week I did 125 push ups (military style, some diamonds). I felt the same way when I was able to lose weight and not get off course even though I was in pain. Not reverting to over-eating again and being able to fit back into old clothes makes me proud as well.  I also realized I had not called myself fat in months, or felt guilty for eating less than perfect food here and there.

8. How do you prevent relapse?

When I start to think that I can pig out, I have to remind myself, that food is not just meant for enjoyment and that all the work I have put in can be reversed. Also, I want to continue logging, until I get the hang of intuitive eating (I do this weekends currently).

9. How has your life changed now that you've lost weight?

My confidence in all areas of life has soared. I know how to forgive myself and love myself for deeper reasons. I no longer have as much knee pain. I feel strong, and love the way I look.

10. What five tips do you have for other dieters?

• Know that forgiving yourself and focusing on your goals instead of your failures gives you more power.
• Often, there are other things we have let fall to the wayside along with our weight. Occupy yourself with getting other things back
  on track too so that it does not consume all your thoughts.
• Don't worry about how long it will take. The time will pass by
  either way. Spend it productively.
• Do not try to cheat your body. It will beat you at your own game. Don't eat less than what you need to be healthy.
• Give what you want to receive. The more people you cheer up, the
  more people you give kind advice to - the more people you will have in
  your corner.

1765/240.1

Sam Adams Winter Lager is the Debbil. Shame on me for not checking the calories before I bought it. It is really good, but like all good things, it must be taken in small doses.

Rib Fest tommorrow. Not interested in the pork so much as Geo Thorogood. Unfortunately he's on last so I'll just have to put up with the pork, and the beer and Blue Oyster Cult, and great friends while I wait.

The answer will undoubtedly be more cowbell.

I hope all Claire's friends see this message; I have posted and sent messages to as many people as I could.

1535/237.6

First of all, thanks for all the well wishes.  It does lift my spirits to hear from everybody.

Update:  I am having one of the worst days ever.  First of all, the shock this morning did its work and I'm back in regular heart rythym but feeling totally drained and exhausted.  Then, pulling out of the parking lot at the medical office building I hit a post with my passenger side view mirror, which broke and swung into the side window and shattered it.  Did I mention it's raining?  So, I pulled into my local Tires Plus, knowing they don't do body work but to ask them to just seal it up with plastic so the rain doesn't come in.  I am very short on ready cash and my credit card is close to the limit so I don't know how I'm going to get this fixed.  I don't know how I could have been so stupid and inattentive - I didn't even see the post, which was tilted out into the lane anyway.  Poor Bubba had to be locked into the bathroom until the exterminator finished.  I put him in there before I went out with his food, litter tray and blanket.  He really cried to get out, poor guy.  Now I'm home and you probably won't hear from me the rest of the day. 

This will be a short one for today.   I've been feeling poorly with all kinds of heart irregularities for the past month.  I saw the doc yesterday and had my defibrillator checked and some settings updated.  He changed my meds and put me back on something that worked in the past (Amiodarone) and I was to take the first dose this morning.  At 6:00 am my defibrillator delivered a shock, waking me up with a yell.  It's an upsetting thing to have happen, but I have to say that at this moment I feel better than I have in weeks.  I'm back in regular rythym I guess.  I'll go in to the office when it opens to be checked out.  I'm actually glad it happened.  By the way - that stuff about it feeling like a kick in the chest are not true.  It feels like an electrical shock - just what it is.  The pain is momentary and minimal.  Makes you jump and let out a yelp, but it's over in less than a second.  Wierd feeling.

Anyhow - Gale will be here at 8 to clean.  I've showered and am ready to get dressed.  Then it's off to see the doc at 9.  Who knows about the rest of the day.  I'll find a way to notify everyone if I have to go to  the hospital, but it's unlikely that will happen.

I hope to be back with an update around noon.  Love you all! 

No school today for Veteran's Day.  I'm very greatful for all of our vets.  Without them we wouldn't have the freedom we take for granted. 

Haven't been counting in a while.  My 6 year old got a part in the play at my school so rehearsal has been crazy.  The play is next week she is so excited and can't wait.  It's a pretty big speaking part for an elementary school kid for the hs play.  She loves the spotlight!!  Baby is sick again, won't be the last time this season.  November is a pretty easy month with school, we have off at least once a week usually twice (next week is our only full week this month).  Christmas is coming way to fast.  I have so many things to do before then might have to take a personal day to shop!  That can be fun but crazy at the same time.

Have a great day all!

egg salad sandwich - 390
broccoli soup - 160
OJ - 160
Soup - 240
cafe mocha - 270
=====
1220 cals so far

Weight has been between 138 and 139 all week. Looks like I've gained a bit of non-water weight. However, it is pre-totm, so, who knows. All I know is it's time to stop snacking and over-eating. And the food I eat must be healthy. Chips, buttery popcorn and fatty starbucks beverages are out!

I think I'll make a nice sign for my fridge telling me to go away, with alternatives to snacking. Too often I find myself munching without even having thought about getting the food.

1220 calories. If I can stop there, I'll be so happy. I definitely feel full after the big serving of thick tomato red pepper soup, and although the 270 calories on a sexy caffeinated starbuck beverage probably weren't the healthiest spent, it gave me a great happy sugar caffeine boost for the term presentation in uncoventional computing - which went pretty well. :)

Today's Art of the Season - Rain!

I got a good bit done yesterday thanks to Lesley - shopping and tidying the place up. 

I'm feeling achy and realize that I've been neglecting my stretching, balance and upper back exercises.  I started right back in this morning with the upper back and will do the balance routine in a little while.  Those aches will disappear.

Plan for today:  I'll be busy with phone calls in the morning and a doctor's appointment in the afternoon.  In just a minute I'm putting a chicken into the crockpot to make Sticky Chicken.  I did the spice rub last night and it's been marinating.  I used Old Bay seasoning with some extra cumin and cayenne pepper, salt and black pepper.

Menu for today:  Breakfast - raisin bran, milk.  Lunch - salad with hard boiled egg.  Snack  - apple, almonds.  Supper - sticky chicken, brown rice, lots of veggies.  Snack - herbal tea, milk

It's raining and expected to rain for the rest of the week.  I just got my car dried out inside, and now It will be wet again.  It's not fun driving a swamp.  I really need a "new" car, but just can't swing it this year.  The old rust bucket will just have to go on for another year.  Is there a car year, like a dog year?  If so, how many years would 16 be in car years?  I would say it's pretty elderly.

Today:  Umbrellas and raincoats are the order of the day.