Chelle 42 yr old Pagan Witch, mom of 4, living in the MidWest
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Week 7 Challenge, Part 1: *Personal Goals* ~
Strive & Be HappyOct 21 2006 23:18
Week 7 Challenge, Part 1: *Personal Goals* ~ Strive & Be Happy
What do you need to do this week? Just like the first week! It's a chance to look back at where you were when we started that 1st week in September. What you want to do the rest of the year? Next Year?
(my answers will be in purple, as usual! lol)
First, I want to say that I can't believe it's already been 7 weeks!! Time sure has flown. I started my diet at the same time the challenges started, and I came to the challenges during the 2nd week, and I can't thank you all enough for all the help and support and advice you have given me along the way. It truly has been a wonderful and life-changing experience and I hope that the friendships I have made along the way will continue even after the challenges are over.
To answer the questions: What I want to do the rest of the year, and for 2007, is continue to lose weight, and make healthy, educated choices in what I eat and how I exercise and how I live. I have a total of 275-ish lbs to lose from start to finish, so I know (realistically) that I won't hit my goal til some time around the end of September 2009 (although I hope it will be sooner than that!), and that's o.k., because I will be making the changes that will affect my life long-term and hopefully increase the quality and length of what life I have left. So I feel that the efforts I am putting in now is worth it. Once I get to my goal, I wish to maintain the goal weight and not have to ever have to go through this weight loss HELL again. I really think that, after seeing how much I will have to do and go through to lose it, that I really will do all I can to make sure I don't gain it back. I don't want to live like this anymore, or again. I don't ever want to be this size again, in this lifetime or any lifetime.
All I know is I am on my way to a smaller, and much healthier, size and way of life. And that makes everything that I'm doing, worth it.
What do you need to do this week? Just like the first week! It's a chance to look back at where you were when we started that 1st week in September. What you want to do the rest of the year? Next Year?
(my answers will be in purple, as usual! lol)
First, I want to say that I can't believe it's already been 7 weeks!! Time sure has flown. I started my diet at the same time the challenges started, and I came to the challenges during the 2nd week, and I can't thank you all enough for all the help and support and advice you have given me along the way. It truly has been a wonderful and life-changing experience and I hope that the friendships I have made along the way will continue even after the challenges are over.
To answer the questions: What I want to do the rest of the year, and for 2007, is continue to lose weight, and make healthy, educated choices in what I eat and how I exercise and how I live. I have a total of 275-ish lbs to lose from start to finish, so I know (realistically) that I won't hit my goal til some time around the end of September 2009 (although I hope it will be sooner than that!), and that's o.k., because I will be making the changes that will affect my life long-term and hopefully increase the quality and length of what life I have left. So I feel that the efforts I am putting in now is worth it. Once I get to my goal, I wish to maintain the goal weight and not have to ever have to go through this weight loss HELL again. I really think that, after seeing how much I will have to do and go through to lose it, that I really will do all I can to make sure I don't gain it back. I don't want to live like this anymore, or again. I don't ever want to be this size again, in this lifetime or any lifetime.
All I know is I am on my way to a smaller, and much healthier, size and way of life. And that makes everything that I'm doing, worth it.
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Touching BaseOct 20 2006 12:10
Just figured I'd write a quick note to say "hi" to all my buddies here at CC and hope you are all having a good day today! As for me, I'm doing very good! Earlier this week I stepped on the scale and weighed 408.6, which I was happy about because that was a 2 lb loss from the prior week. However now I am ecstatic, although I don't know exactly HOW I did it (I am still around 1500-1700 cals for the day, including any extra food I am consuming to make up for calories burned during exercise/activity)... I am now at 403.4 lbs, as of today. I have been doing awesome with my water (go me!) and watching the calories, though I am still having a lil problem with getting the munchies at night. (I've been trying to choose low fat, low calorie options when they get bad, and drinking the water right along with them.)
I am not starving myself in any way, so I know I'm o.k. Just happy with the weight loss, and seeing it coming off.
I'm off to run some errands in a little while. Have to return the older scale via UPS, pick up my son's meds (the neurologist changed it on Monday) and have to set up a checking account with Avon. (For those who are interested, I am now selling AVON - online as well as face-to-face - my online site is here.) LOL I know, shameless plugging. ::grin::
Hope you all are having a good one - keep up the awesome work!!
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Week 5 Challenge, Part 7: Walking the Walk ~ Why
should I??? (Week 6 too?)Oct 17 2006 08:43
Week 5 Challenge, Part 7: Walking the Walk ~ Why should I???
(my answers will be in purple, below)
What do you need to do this week? Just 2 easy things!!!
- On a personal note. Continue to think about why you exercise, count calories, use this web-site. Has it impacted your health? How & why??? Next week, we'll talk about why we are doing all this...
I guess this might also be Week 6 as well??
There are many reasons why I am trying to lose weight - for better health, to look and feel better, to be more attractive... and yes I do feel that it has impacted my health, and not just on the physical level either. It has changed the way I think about myself, and how I feel about myself emotionally and psychologically. In the past when I dieted, I always felt like I was going to fail at it from day one. While I have had a day here and there that have been tougher than others, and my depression had me really in a low point about a week ago, I have not given up. I have not had the "I've totally failed again" thoughts or mindset of the past. I have amazed myself at how I have been able to pick myself up and try again. Counting calories - and other nutritional info - has made me more aware of what I am putting in my body, and what I no longer want in my body. It has made me more accountable to myself as well as responsible for my own eating habits and actions. I have found this site to be invaluable - the logs, the forums, the help and support of fellow members - and I am very glad that I found it. It has made the last month and half easier to keep with my diet because I don't feel like I am alone in this, and that I have the support of others who are going through what I'm going through, and can offer suggestions or advice when I am stuck.
Three cheers for C-C!!
There are many reasons why I am trying to lose weight - for better health, to look and feel better, to be more attractive... and yes I do feel that it has impacted my health, and not just on the physical level either. It has changed the way I think about myself, and how I feel about myself emotionally and psychologically. In the past when I dieted, I always felt like I was going to fail at it from day one. While I have had a day here and there that have been tougher than others, and my depression had me really in a low point about a week ago, I have not given up. I have not had the "I've totally failed again" thoughts or mindset of the past. I have amazed myself at how I have been able to pick myself up and try again. Counting calories - and other nutritional info - has made me more aware of what I am putting in my body, and what I no longer want in my body. It has made me more accountable to myself as well as responsible for my own eating habits and actions. I have found this site to be invaluable - the logs, the forums, the help and support of fellow members - and I am very glad that I found it. It has made the last month and half easier to keep with my diet because I don't feel like I am alone in this, and that I have the support of others who are going through what I'm going through, and can offer suggestions or advice when I am stuck.
Three cheers for C-C!!
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I'm so happy! Flying on Air!!Oct 16 2006 12:37
We are about to head out in about 15 minutes or so, however I *had*to write!!
I just got up about an hour and half ago, and got ready to get in the shower to get ready. I stepped on the scale, and it showed I had a 2 lbs loss!! I am so happy, I feel like I'm flying on air. You could have said I lost 100 lbs - that's how good I'm feeling! However, it doesn't end there. I had ordered a new scale last week (digital - see here), and it arrived while I was in the shower. So I got dressed while Wes got the batteries in it, and we headed to the bathroom, and I weighed myself. Well, the news even got better and it also showed that YES, the analog scale I had purchased earlier this month was off by 8-10 lbs!! While the analog (dial) scale showed me at 418 (which showed a 2 lbs loss from the 420 a week ago), the new digital scale shows me at 410.6!! So I am very happy. I have already updated my weight to show the 410.6, and I am returning the dial scale. And I am feeling MUCH better about all the dieting I have been doing.
Just wanted to share that with you all. Woo Hoo!!! ::does the happy pagan dance::
EDIT: Wes and I were talking about this later on and he said that he distinctly remembers telling me that he read the scale at 408.6, not the 410.6 that I stated above, because he remembers me saying that there was a 10 lb difference between the analog (dial) scale and the digital (new) scale. ::sigh::
I just got up about an hour and half ago, and got ready to get in the shower to get ready. I stepped on the scale, and it showed I had a 2 lbs loss!! I am so happy, I feel like I'm flying on air. You could have said I lost 100 lbs - that's how good I'm feeling! However, it doesn't end there. I had ordered a new scale last week (digital - see here), and it arrived while I was in the shower. So I got dressed while Wes got the batteries in it, and we headed to the bathroom, and I weighed myself. Well, the news even got better and it also showed that YES, the analog scale I had purchased earlier this month was off by 8-10 lbs!! While the analog (dial) scale showed me at 418 (which showed a 2 lbs loss from the 420 a week ago), the new digital scale shows me at 410.6!! So I am very happy. I have already updated my weight to show the 410.6, and I am returning the dial scale. And I am feeling MUCH better about all the dieting I have been doing.
Just wanted to share that with you all. Woo Hoo!!! ::does the happy pagan dance::
EDIT: Wes and I were talking about this later on and he said that he distinctly remembers telling me that he read the scale at 408.6, not the 410.6 that I stated above, because he remembers me saying that there was a 10 lb difference between the analog (dial) scale and the digital (new) scale. ::sigh::
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Not much to sayOct 16 2006 01:06
Not much going on this weekend. It was fairly quiet. For the most part I kept on my diet - I did 1709 cals yesterday and 1749 cals today, and my intake is suppose to be around 1500-1700 (I try to bounce it around a little to keep my metabolism guessing lol). My only downfall today is I didn't get in all my waters like I usually do. I'm typically really good about getting at least 8 8-oz a day. Today I fell really short. ::sigh:: As Scarlett O'Hara said, "tomorrow is another day". LOL
We have a busy day tomorrow. We have to leave here by 1 PM to take my son to his neuro appointment. It's a 1.5 hour drive each way, so we need to pick up Becka from school a lil early as there won't be anyone here to get her when school normally lets out. (Kris has severe, frequent migraines/headaches - has had several tests, all came back normal - he sees a neuro in Lawton, OK once every 4 months or so, and he is on medication... the migraines/headaches are also the reason he is home tutored.) I need to let the Doctor know about the really bad headache he had last Thursday (on a scale of 1-10, Kris put it at an 11.). It was so bad that we actually rescheduled his tutoring session that was suppose to be that day. His tutor is great and very understanding about his headaches, which is a big help. Since we'll be away from home during dinnertime, I'm not really sure how we're going to swing mealtime. I'm gonna bring an apple with me and a bottle of water, so I can munch on that if the munchies really get bad during the drive. I usually bring something to do as well - book, cross-stitch, magazine, etc - to keep me busy. I think Wes and I will be splitting the driving this time... not sure yet.
Oh - and my daughter's ear is feeling much better!!! ::smiles::
Anyways, just touching base and wanted to say "hi" to everyone and hope you are all having a good week so far. Keep up the awesome work. We can do it!!
We have a busy day tomorrow. We have to leave here by 1 PM to take my son to his neuro appointment. It's a 1.5 hour drive each way, so we need to pick up Becka from school a lil early as there won't be anyone here to get her when school normally lets out. (Kris has severe, frequent migraines/headaches - has had several tests, all came back normal - he sees a neuro in Lawton, OK once every 4 months or so, and he is on medication... the migraines/headaches are also the reason he is home tutored.) I need to let the Doctor know about the really bad headache he had last Thursday (on a scale of 1-10, Kris put it at an 11.). It was so bad that we actually rescheduled his tutoring session that was suppose to be that day. His tutor is great and very understanding about his headaches, which is a big help. Since we'll be away from home during dinnertime, I'm not really sure how we're going to swing mealtime. I'm gonna bring an apple with me and a bottle of water, so I can munch on that if the munchies really get bad during the drive. I usually bring something to do as well - book, cross-stitch, magazine, etc - to keep me busy. I think Wes and I will be splitting the driving this time... not sure yet.
Oh - and my daughter's ear is feeling much better!!! ::smiles::
Anyways, just touching base and wanted to say "hi" to everyone and hope you are all having a good week so far. Keep up the awesome work. We can do it!!
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Back in the SaddleOct 14 2006 18:06
Well, I'm back on the horse and so far I've been doing good. I have had a large salad with chicken in it, and an apple, and 4 of the 8 (minimum) waters for the day. If I get over 8, then I'm golden, but I shoot for at least the 8. I've been doing some housework so killing some calories there. And most of all, trying to stay positive and not let those negative thoughts and feelings come through. Just gotta keep reminding myself WHY I am doing this, and that no-one can do it for me.
Thanks to those who have written and encouraged me and have given support. You really are awesome, and I am so thankful for you all! ::big hugs::
I need to remember: believe that I can do this and I will succeed!!
Thanks to those who have written and encouraged me and have given support. You really are awesome, and I am so thankful for you all! ::big hugs::
I need to remember: believe that I can do this and I will succeed!!
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*Make Yourself A Priority* ~ If you slip, Get Up,
Dust Off & Start Again!Oct 13 2006 15:06
I kinda "borrowed" this from the CC Challenge for week 6, because this seems to be a recurring theme in both my life, and in posts I seem to be writing to others in regards to their weight loss this last week or so. I've been telling others that you haven't failed if you get back up, dust yourself off and go on from there. I guess I now need to tell myself that. Last weekend, I allowed myself a little leeway and I didn't totally stick to my diet. I didn't go hog-wild, didn't eat 3000+ calories a day, but I didn't stick to my usual 1500-1700 cals/day either. I didn't do much by way of activity or exercise, and I'm feeling it. On top of it all, it was TTOM, and I was fighting a sore throat that wanted to do some travelling into my ear. It was only because I took major amounts of Vitamin C was I able to stop it from going any further. I have tried a few times since then to get back on the dieting and exercising and to 'get serious', and just having the toughest of times. I seem to be in a low point of my depression cycle, and I'm fighting to scramble out of that pit too. I am forcing myself to drink my water, to eat sensibly and pretty much the activity around the house will be my exercise for the day. I am really really trying. I just feel so defeated, and worthless, and unloveable, and like a fool, and so many other things that I can't even name. I know what I need to do, and how it needs to be done. The part of me that is so tired of feeling and being fat wants to do it - desperately - yet this dark and desperate part of me that the depression has it's clutches in seems to want total control. I don't want to feel like this, I hate feeling like this. It's such a vicious cycle...I feel like this because I'm fat, however I'm fat (emotional eating and bingeing) because I feel like this. It's hard to break a cycle that I've known my whole life. I'm tired of existing. I want to live. It's like I'm waiting for permission to live, and I am not even sure who from.
On top of it, I am so on edge today. I have no tolerance today for anyone or anything. I don't want to listen to the kids, or Wes or anything or anyone. I have already raised my voice - and then tried to catch myself before it got worse. Then I find myself taking all that irritation and aggravation and GRRRRRR inward so I don't end up hurting anyone else. It almost feels like my brain is oozing out of my ears. Every little thing is irritating the living HELL out of me and I don't even know what triggered this. How can I work on getting rid of the problem(s) if I don't even know what they are? I'm aggravated, frustrated, depressed, feeling a bit cynical, annoyed, bitchy, cranky, unproductive, and I'm sure some other things if I thought about it long enough.
On top of it, I am so on edge today. I have no tolerance today for anyone or anything. I don't want to listen to the kids, or Wes or anything or anyone. I have already raised my voice - and then tried to catch myself before it got worse. Then I find myself taking all that irritation and aggravation and GRRRRRR inward so I don't end up hurting anyone else. It almost feels like my brain is oozing out of my ears. Every little thing is irritating the living HELL out of me and I don't even know what triggered this. How can I work on getting rid of the problem(s) if I don't even know what they are? I'm aggravated, frustrated, depressed, feeling a bit cynical, annoyed, bitchy, cranky, unproductive, and I'm sure some other things if I thought about it long enough.
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The ER - add-on for 10/10/06Oct 10 2006 18:52
Well, took her to the ER, and yes, she did have a "slight" ear infection (her ear drums were slightly bulging), and the Doctor prescribed Amoxycillin. However she added, if my daughter did not have the history of ear infections that she does have, she would probably have just left them alone and not prescribed anything. (All I could think was, 'yep, and we'll be back in 3 days and she'll be in a LOT worse shape'...but I kept my mouth shut.) So we got it filled on the way home and she just took her first dose. And the ER took her insurance info, and didn't ask for a co-pay or anything from me, and I even explained to them what happened with the doctors and such, and they didn't seem bothered by it. I also told them that, where she has a history of ear infections, I don't mess with them, so that I figured it was enough of an emergency (not to risk her health) to bring her in. Again, no disputes from them. And the pharmacy ran her card number through and it covered her medication. I'm glad.
I have only had about 250 calories today (had a bowl of cheerios before we left - we were there for a little over 3 hours!), so I'm gonna go grab something to eat. I'm really hungry LOL Hope you all are having a good day, and thank you to those who gave wishes that she feels better soon. She knows she needs to try and go to school tomorrow, and I got a note for the school from the ER doctor, so she should be covered there as well.
Take care everyone - :: hugs :: to all!!
I have only had about 250 calories today (had a bowl of cheerios before we left - we were there for a little over 3 hours!), so I'm gonna go grab something to eat. I'm really hungry LOL Hope you all are having a good day, and thank you to those who gave wishes that she feels better soon. She knows she needs to try and go to school tomorrow, and I got a note for the school from the ER doctor, so she should be covered there as well.
Take care everyone - :: hugs :: to all!!
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My Scale Arrived!!Oct 10 2006 12:33
Woot! The scale arrived!! I just stepped on it, and it says I am 420, which I am not too happy about. However, to be honest, the last few days I have not been eating totally healthy, plus TTOM started 2 days ago, and I haven't done really well with my water.
I guess this is my wake-up call to get back to business.
Wow...
I guess this is my wake-up call to get back to business.
Wow...
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Week 5 Challenge Part 2: Eat Well &
Appropriately!Oct 10 2006 12:17
(my responses will be in purple)
Week 5 Challenge Part 2: Eat Well & Appropriately!
But, what we eat & why? 1 food after another, we need to check it out and figure out... is this something we should eat? Why ~ How ~ When ~ What to eat! All crucial to understanding ourselves and creating meal plans that are appropriate for our own self.... unique to each of us... Just for us! We each need to figure out what we like to eat and how we can eat, year after year. Not just while we're on some temporary *diet*...
We need to figure out what we like and what will satisfy us! What we can do personally and live with, that makes us happy... Understanding things like why, how, when & what you eat is simply a place to start.
First off, I'd like to say I agree. We need to first find out what we like/don't like, and what we can live with so that we can lose the weight and then maintain it. If we are eating foods that we are not happy with, then we are not likely to stick with that diet for too long, and then end up going back to the unhealthy eating that got us here.
I have been looking over what I like, what I don't like, what I can easily, happily make modifications to, and what I can say "ok, its a few more calories than 'x' however I'm not willing to compromise with this", and be ok with that decision. For example, I have found a lower fat mayonnaise that I am ok with, and have no problems with using instead of the higher fat mayo I used to use. I have taken up eating sherbet instead of my fat-laden ice cream, and again, quite ok with my decision. When I am in want of chocolate (which isn't all that often), I find one of the chocolate Yoplait Whips does the trick. However, there are certain things that I would rather have the 'real' version of, and I have accepted the fact that 1) this is a conscious decision I am making and 2) will have to account for it in my food logs AND in the way I am living, eating and even exercising. For example, there are times when I will use real butter (not margarine) on certain things. Last night we had nice, fresh French Bread (sliced) with our dinner, and I wanted real butter on my bread. I knew that it would be higher fat and calories, however I still opted for the butter. I made a conscious decision. To me, the margarine would not have been the same.
I am also becoming more aware of when I am eating my food, and if it is in reaction to actual hunger, or if it is an emotional cue, for example. If it is not hunger, then I try to wait a little bit, drink some water, get my mind off of it (or deal with the issue at hand) and not turn to food as my comfort.
It's all about knowing your options, what you like and don't like, and living with the decisions that you make.
I have been looking over what I like, what I don't like, what I can easily, happily make modifications to, and what I can say "ok, its a few more calories than 'x' however I'm not willing to compromise with this", and be ok with that decision. For example, I have found a lower fat mayonnaise that I am ok with, and have no problems with using instead of the higher fat mayo I used to use. I have taken up eating sherbet instead of my fat-laden ice cream, and again, quite ok with my decision. When I am in want of chocolate (which isn't all that often), I find one of the chocolate Yoplait Whips does the trick. However, there are certain things that I would rather have the 'real' version of, and I have accepted the fact that 1) this is a conscious decision I am making and 2) will have to account for it in my food logs AND in the way I am living, eating and even exercising. For example, there are times when I will use real butter (not margarine) on certain things. Last night we had nice, fresh French Bread (sliced) with our dinner, and I wanted real butter on my bread. I knew that it would be higher fat and calories, however I still opted for the butter. I made a conscious decision. To me, the margarine would not have been the same.
I am also becoming more aware of when I am eating my food, and if it is in reaction to actual hunger, or if it is an emotional cue, for example. If it is not hunger, then I try to wait a little bit, drink some water, get my mind off of it (or deal with the issue at hand) and not turn to food as my comfort.
It's all about knowing your options, what you like and don't like, and living with the decisions that you make.
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