x17star17x's Journal
This is just a test of the emergency broadcast
systemNov 03 2009 22:23
Maybe this is a test. Test to see whether Ezra and I can live off his income + just my 2 days of working. After this month, we'll see if I can persue my dreams and just learn more CAKE! I don't want another hell hole of a job. Even if I can get an internship in a bakery somewhere. I contacted a company (Butterandme.com) earlier this year and they said maybe during the winter months they'd take someone in :)
I was looking up the Arizona state laws on selling food, even through your home, and you have to obtain an LLC and even have your home inspected by the inspection people. Also they have to make sure that you are in good health so you dont get nastys in the food. I might as well start on at least getting the LLC set up. It shouldn't cost all that much. Ugh. I've been spoken to about the 'hows' to set up an LLC in the past, so the paperwork is tucked in my drawer somewhere. This is all just overwhelming and over my head.
At least with these thoughts, I can let my stress ease a bit. Tomorrow I'm going to be home alone, and figured I'd play in what I have. I don't have money to go pick up new pans and whatnot, but I do have TONS of powdered sugar, a tub of crisco, and boxes of cake mix. Let's play!
I'm such a nerd I swear. Maybe this time I'll do cupcakes instead.
Okay enough cake talk. Now on to a serious matter.
I broke down last night and told Ezra my drinking HAS to stop in the way it has been lately. I drank Tuesday, Wednesday, (skipped Thursday because my stomach couldn't take it) Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. Monday I just knew I couldn't be doing this to myself anymore. I haven't been as honest with him as I should have been. I've been pushing the fact that this isn't okay, but I think it was at the point I broke down and told him "I can't sleep, I wake up with cold sweats, my heart rate is going wacko, my digestive system hasn't been right in months, and I wake up with the shakes so sick to my stomach I don't want to move" <-- that really hit home with him I think. I'm not just getting chunky, I'm making myself sick. So this is the first Tuesday night in quite a while that I haven't had drinks. There's nothing left after this weekend anyway, so nothing to fear.
Today I got a 6 mile power walk in (burnt 720 cals - didn't work out yesterday), and my 1500 cals in my intake. I feel nice, and motivated. I'm avoiding the scale, but I'm REALLY excited to wear my jeans again. Just give it time. 2 more weeks and I'm off to Sedona for my romantic get-a-way. And let's face it, I'm eating Mexican w/ salsa and strawberries dipped in chocolate!
One day at a time.
I definitely think you can give up the drinking if you put your mind to it. Look at all the weightloss have achieved, as an example. If you put your mind to it, you really can do anything! :) |
At least you have acknowledged that your drinking is a problem and want to stop. That is the first step and if you really want to you can. Like singing_girl said, you have achieved your major weightloss by putting your mind to it, you can do this as well. Enjoy your romantic get-a-ways...sounds like you need and deserve it |
I know people who have rented out Church kitchen's for their catering. Usually, they are industrial kitchens and they rent for pretty cheap since the Church considers it extra income. I wonder if it would be easier to get an LLC that way? Do the cake thing, you seem to really love it. I had a shitty job and it was so toxic to every area of my life, so I can totally relate to how you are feeling. I took a big risk and left that job, turning my life upside down. But I am so much better for it! No regrets girl, do what you love. |
