VENTING-feeling ashamed about myself:((((

Hi everyone,

I am sorry for venting, but I am so disappointed within myself...In the last few months I've lost about 30-33 pounds maybe a little bit tooo more....93 pounds was my lowest. At this weight (93 lbs) I wasn't feeling healthy and I looked too skinny, I was craving food all the time and feeling nervous also, so it was very hard to stay at this low weight. Finally I gave in for the temptations and I just binged a lots of time (I end up eating all that garbage-sweets, junk food...), so now I've almost gained back all the weight I've lost:(((((It seems to me I am an all or nothing person...

Since the binges occured, every morning I wake up with the strong decision that  I'll jump back on the wagon and re-commit myself, then finally somehow I always screw up my diet. I was so proud about my achievement, and now I feel so ashemed of my weightgain. It's so embarassing meeting with other people who previously have noticed my weightloss and now they see me fat. I really don't understand how I had the strong willpower a few months ago and no how I can't back on the track...I really would like to have a healthy lifestile combined with a balanced diet.

How do you guys get your willpower back?:(((((((I want it back for FOREVER:)!

Thanks for listening.

Every thought is WELCOME

I just want to say that you are not alone. I've also been struggling to get back to normal for a couple months now. Everyday I have new determination, but by late afternoon somehow it all gets thrown out the window. My willpower seems to have run away like yours. My only advice is to cut your calories back slowly. Don't try to rush jumping back into weight loss. Take care of ending these binges first.

Here's my advice:

What's your calorie target for weight loss? Make sure it's not under your BMR, and that you're not losing more than 1% of body weight in a week. Once you have a healthy target you can slowly work towards that goal following a plan.

1. Take a week to just focus on listening to your body's hunger signals. Don't have a number to aim for. Eat when you're hungry, don't when you're not. If a craving strikes, before indulging try to pinpoint what brought it on. A smell? A visual like a picture or seeing someone else eat? Once you recognize it, determine whether or not you actually want it. Go ahead and indulge. Afterall, nothing is off limits. The only catch is you HAVE to write down everything you eat.

2. After you take a weekly average, start reducing your intake by 100-200 a day. Do not go more than this, cuz you might trigger yourself into binging again. You might find you are still eating at or over maintenance at this point, depending on how much you ate the first week, but that's okay. Stay away from the scale, your priority at the moment is to end the binging.

3. Every week keep reducing your calories by 100-200 until you reach your target for weight loss.

So if in the first week you averaged 2,500 a day and your goal is 1,700 it would look like this:

Week 1: 2,500
Week 2: 2,300
Week 3: 2,100
Week 4: 1,900
Week 5: 1,700

You can do it. Good luck!

You simply keep your goal in mind and do what it takes to achieve that. It's not complicated. Willpower is just the process of recognizing that you can or can't do something that will help or hurt you in achieving your goals. "Feeling ashamed of yourself" is just the kind of complaining that destroys your willpower. If you have to eat a chicken salad instead of fries to accomplish your goal, then don't eat fries. If you lose sight of your goal, you will also lose your willpower.

How tall are you?

 

first of all...how tall are you?!? You would have to be well under 5' in order for 93lbs to be healthy and your original weight of 120lbs to be considered unhealthy.

Unless you haven't changed your weight log in your profile, 48 kg (105 lb) at 5'4" is HARDLY "gaining it all back."  Not to mention that your original weight of 123 lb was perfectly fine and healthy. 

Hello everyone,

Thank you guys for  your quick reply, and sorry for the late response...I like CC's supportive community.

To answer your question I'm 5'4" (160 cm) tall...My actual weight is around 110 lbs, and is continously going up. BUT when it comes abut ideal/healthy weight I think the BMI tool it's not very accurate in determining it. For example I have a small frame, with tiny bones and a high body fat percentage 28%(we all know that fat cells are more lighter than muscle cells) two months ago was about 17%. So that are my stats. My weight is going up dramatically fast because of the constant cravings and binges. I just want (I'm actually struggling) to put an end to this  nightmare. I think I'll take your advice "ezzied" and I'll try gradually lower my calorie intake.

Thank you for your advice and great support!

 

 

 

Since you are not overweight, strength training and a reasonable diet would probably do you much better aesthetically than weight loss. You tend to lose muscle mass when you diet, and your body fat % will not necessarily get better. You honestly should not be less than 110. Nor should you feel ashamed of yourself for where you are.

 

hun, I know this is not what you want to hear, but your willpower is certainly not the problem. You're body is screaming for calories...hence the bingeing, because you were at such a low weight. Just because you and maybe even others think you look fabulous at such a low weight does not, by any means, mean that it is HEALTHY for you. A healthy weight is something that means you are not over or underweight, and is something that you should be able to maintain fairly naturally. You should not feel hungry all of the time, that means you are not getting enough food. I have been through this. My body likes to be between 108-115, anything above I feel chunky, and anything below I feel like I could eat a cow and am always nervous. In this range, I can eat what I want, as long as I work out and try to keep it pretty healhty most of time. And I'm 2 inches shorter than you. So you have got to be thin at 5'4 110 lbs. Also, our society has such a distorted perception of what is "healthy" and "normal". I by no means advocate fatness or laziness. That being said, I also don't advocate striving to have the perfect waifer-like body of those in the movies and such. What is hot about a woman who starves herself? Listen to your body. If it wants to be at 110, let it go. There are so many more important things in the world you can focus your time and effort on. Enjoy your life. Its way to short to constantly worry about how much you weigh or how many calories from fat you had today, espcially when you are already at a healthy weight.