Venting about Rude People

Hey guys I just have to have a little rant about rude people.

There's a coworker of mine who is an older man and really really thin.  I am obviously trying to lose weight, and he doesnt know me so how would he know how hard im trying or what methods Im using.  For me 5 small meals a day works. 

So im on meal number 4 yesterday afternoon.  Its my usual afternoon snack of soup.  and AS USUAL this skinny co worker says "Oh gosh, you;re eating AGAIN!  You're always eating!"

He's said that 3 times to me now and I usually ignore him, but this time there were people around and people stared and I just wanted to run to the washroom and stay there...

thats SO RUDE!!  My mum taught me to NEVER comment about people's weights or eating, ESPECIALLY not in front of other people!!! 

WHere are the Manners???

anyways, thats all, I just had to rant a bit, cause my feelings were hurt...

Why not just say, "Well your UGLY everyday, at least I can fix my problem".

Or think of some other snappy comeback, or just tell him to go "F" himself...

Rude people really just NEED to be embarassed or put in their place in front of other people to "get it".  I don't take crap from anyone.  Best of luck to you!

I totally 100% understand where you ar coming from, but sometimes people don't think before they speak, and he may not intentionally mean to hurt your feelings. Just try to ignore his comments and you can prance around your new skinny self when you lose the weight!!

There was a really good post a few weeks ago about repsonses to rude comments and there were some really good ones... especially the ones where your integrity remains intact but you make the offender feel like the lousiest human being on the planet. :) Maybe someone can find it...

OR...  if you want it to stop...

Maybe you can just answer politely (next time) that you'd appreciate if he would stop commenting on your eating habits.  You find it offensive.

No need to explain yourself - it's not his business.

maybe instead of trying to be witty, tell me maturely "I'm switching to having smaller meals throughout the day to keep my blood sugar level. It's healthier this way." I bet he'll feel so ashamed cuz it totally makes him look immature and, of course, like the jerk he is.

Maybe say something like: "That's offensive."  Or ask "why do you care?"  If you put the onus on him to explain himself, he might be able to see how rude he really is.  Otherwise, just ignore him.

Ohhh all really good answers!! 

I will try to find the other thread too.

I know I can be outraged and talk really big here, but I know that there's a chance that if he says it again tommorow I will be to mortified to say anything!

I just want to let him know that his comments are hurtful. 

hahahahaha I WILL prance around in front of him at my goal weight and say "HA! SEE! Eating all the time did this to me, bet you couldnt do it!"

Well maybe I was a littel harsh.

Email goes a long way for people who are too scared to confront face to face.

Try a little email explaining ONLY what you wish to divulge...

I totally understand you on your post.  I also have a skinny coworker (female) who always makes a comment when she see's me eating.  My problem is that she knows that I am trying to live a healthier life, we have discussed it in the past.  I dont know if she just feels like she needs to say something when she comes into my office or if she's being rude on purpose!  And like you, they are healthy snacks, its not like I'm shoving a pound of chocolate in my mouth everytime she comes in!

Here's a thought - next time you get the "you're always eating" comment you need to come back with "and you're always watching.  Haven't you got anything better to do than monitor my eating habits?"  Maybe that will get your point across. 

I'm sorry, but I don't see this as necessarily rude. I suppose it depends on the delivery?

I have a coworker who is eating every single time I happen to go to her desk. I've worked with this woman for 11 years. I always comment about it, and I don't mean it unkindly at all -- it's funny! She finds it funny, too; we have laughed about this for years! It doesn't matter WHAT time I show up at her desk -- 10:30 AM, 3:00 PM, 9 in the morning... she's eating. I can not see her for months, then go downstairs on some errand in her area, and... she's eating!!! It's amazing!! Now, it's gotten to the point (well, as of about five years ago) where she starts laughing the moment she sees me... sandwich or apple or whatever in her hand!

And I fully expect, though I have a private office (with what seems like a revolving door sometimes), that someday, someone will make the same comment to me, because... I AM always eating! Or so it seems. And so what? The chances are good that someone who is observant enough to notice that I'm always eating has also noticed that my pants are extremely baggy and the only thing holding them up is my belt! My response to, "You're always eating!" would simply be, "I know!!!" and a big smile!

Do you have reason to believe that this man would want to hurt your feelings? If not, perhaps giving him the benefit of the doubt and not assuming malice or unkindness would be the mannerly thing to do.

Tell him that you are trying to gain weight and your doctor told you that you have to eat every two hours.  Just watch the expression on his face.

People are so rude!  Don't these people know you're not supposed to volunteer negative comments like that?  I'm in college, and I recently had a guy in my school tell me that I looked like a fat little kid.  People don't realize how damaging these comments are to people...  I'm a recovered anorexic, and while I have gained some weight in the past 2 years, I know that I'm still not fat.  I'm 5'2" and weighed around 125 before I started this program.  I lost 5 pounds on my own and weighed 120 when i began using this site.  Now I weigh 117.  I'm trying to lose some of the weight and just be healthy now (not so much weight as inches I guess), but comments like that really tend to set you back.  People should be careful what they say to other people, because you never know who's struggling with something like this, and comments like that are very damaging.

Remember that two wrongs don't make a right.  Don't sink to his level by being rude yourself.  I love Athena's response "I know! (big smile)"

I had a similar situation, a co-worker was dieting (and I wasn't)and whenever I ate something, she'd give me a carb count on it and tell me why she would NEVER eat it.  Finally, one day, in complete frustration with her, I calmly said "what are you, the food police?" and she laughed, it broke the tension and she got the point.

Hahahha The food police!

Athena:  I agree i shouldnt jusmp to conclusions, but for the most part the people I work with are really mean spirited.  They really love being cruel to each other, which I;ve never understood.

However I do think it would work to say "I know" witha  dumb smile on my face...

...or ask to see his food police badge...

Oh, not a dumb smile! Make it a truly happy one! You are doing what is best for you. I'm sure that makes you happy, so show it!!

u girls make big things out of little things. what you need to ask yourself is why is it bothering you so much?

what YOU need to ask yourself is why ur so utterly incapable of being empathetic. many guys would be self-conscious of calorie-counting in front of their guy friends too (esp if the friends are lovers of 'real' food such as red meat and fries)

sorry maybe u meant neither harm nor offense when stating that simple rhetorical question, but having been thru similar experiences, it is a bit hurtful. didn't mean to chastise u -_-

Meh, brendan890 is likely just a simple little troll... we get those every so often here. They come up suddenly like a rash, but they go away quickly too. :)