:( weight loss vs. period loss

hi everyone. first i'd like to apologize in advance for if this post ends up a little long, as i often find it quite hard to find the right words to say what i want to..

basically, im a little underweight and have been told by my doctor to gain in order for my period to start again. however, i do not feel i am significantly underweight and whenever i eat enough to put on some weight, i feel like a complete fatty and end up feeling extremely unhappy and restricting afterwards. i managed to gain a couple of pounds, and felt completely awful about it and now i think i have lost them again.

gaining weight feels as though i am just undoing all the hard work and effort that i put in to lose it. i struggled for a long time to lose the weight and i don't want to end up putting it all back on again becuase then it would have been a waste of time.

my period disappeared very early in my weight loss journey and there is no way that i want to be anywhere close to that weight again.  is there any way that i can get it back without gaining weight, for example including more fat in my diet?

i am torn into two because on one hand, i REALLY want it back to be healthy - i know it is damaging my body not to have a period for so long and one day i really want to be able to have children and things.. ON THE OTHER HAND i hate the thought of gaining weight. and i dont even think im really underweight...i spend a lot of the time at my current weight feeling like a fatty anyway.

if anyone has any advice or motivation please help me, i've been struggling with this for such a long time and it's starting to really really get me down :(

 

 

 

helpful info... im 17 years old, 5'5 tall and i weigh around 103lbs. highest weight was 150lbs, lowest weight was about 96lbs. i lost most of the weight in like, 6 months by eating 500-600 cals a day (dont tell me off). ummm. then went on to eat about 1,000 a day for months and lost a bit more although i thought i was maintaining. now i aim to eat 1500 a day but usually end up at 1300. sometimes getting stuck in binge/starve cycles although i'm taking control of that now. i havent had my period for almost a year now, despite starting when i was 12 and being regular every month since, almost to the day.

also i am completely sedentary as i have M.E. (maybe better known as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome in the USA.. not sure?) so i dont burn many calories on an average day, hense my maintenence only being about 1500. 

Some girls take birth contol or get a shot to help them menstruate, but I'm not sure of the details. I'm sorry I'm not of much help, but I feel the same way.

As exercising, I'm sorry to hear about your condition. To raise your metabolism (and thus be able to maintain on more calories) you could lift weights to build more muscle. You only need to do 8-12 reps of each weight. Plus, you have to eat extra calories to build muscle! Maybe you could ask your doctor of any solutions to be able to exercise?

hate to tell you, but i think you probably are too skinny. When I was 17 I was 5'6 and I would have looked skeletal at ~100lbs. your BMI is definitely underweight too. You have some body image issues you need to deal with, because you really need to gain some weight and get your period back. Please be healthy.

Wow you are going through the same thing as me...

We weigh the same but I am 5'4

yah i'm 5'4-5'5 and weight about 98-100. i lost my period when i got down to 83 :X but im gaining back and soo happy. i only need about 2-4 more lb to get back to what i was before an ed *102ish* and i had my period then. i thought i would get my period back a longg time before now because i had it until i got to like 90lb...

 :\

 i feel the same. i, however, am about 110 and 5'3. that is a BMI of just under 20. not even underweight by some standards, yet I havn't gotten my preiod for about 9 months. i too, fluctuate in terms of how motivate i am to lose weight, esp ecausei actually do not look too skiny and by some standards i am not. but even 2 months of not menstruating when you should can do damage. i'm really trying to stik with it and be willing to gain until i get my period back, but its hard to saty motivated enouh. i am also very active. i think this may have something to do with it, because i probably have a relatievly low bf% so may require a slightly higher weight to get my period back. i duno... arg its really ard.

sorry, but there's no way your going to get your period at 103. I am 5'5 and I had an ED and I dwindled down to 82 lbs. I was tube-fed in a hospital up to 112, and my hormone levels are still a bit low. My doctors have told me I need to be 118. then, it could take a few months to get it back.

 hmm ok... seem to be getting mixed responses haha.

to all the girls that have replied and said theyve got the same problem its quite nice to know i'm not the only one in the world, lol :) im sure we'll get there in the end. 

my doctor isnt helping the matter by not seeming particularly bothered about it everytime i ask her for advice.. she just tells me to 'keep eating' and laughs! and ive also asked my osteopath (who i see because of my illness) and she didnt seem bothered either. its so annoying!! i complained to my mum and she was like 'they probably act calm because they dont want you to worry' (i have anxiety problems ahah..) but still. i wish someone would give me some sound advice :(

MUTTLOVER - ive started trying some light weights now after your suggestion and it doesnt seem to be making me too unwell as of yet so thanks for that one :)  

my doctor doesn't even know...

my weight went from 112 at my last appointment to 104 and i told her it was because of volleyball and she understood (i was actually at 90 but i gained weight)

i lied to her about my last one :x

How is your doctor so sure that gaining weight will make you get your period back?

I keep asking my doctor whether it will help me get my period back, but she says she doesn't think its the issue for me. (one of the reasons being that I failed the Provera challenge)

Like you I lost my period very early in weight loss, and I had to get back to the very low end of the "normal weight" BMI for half a year before I got it back. It will take time.

 As I side note, I think anorexia makes people prone to losing their period. My weight has been dropping a bit again - only 10 pounds over 4 months - yet I've lost my period - AGAIN!

 

Talk to a counselor to help you stop feeling like a fatty when you are underweight.

The only way to get your period back, and to be healthy, is to be at a healthy weight and body fat percentage. Our perception of what is a healthy body fat percentage for women is hopelessly skewed by the media - but it's 19-24% (that's "fitness level" body fat). It's very different from men, who are fit at 10-15%. Yet we think we should have six-packs like boys.

The problem is in your head, more than in your body. You won't fix the physical problem until you fix the mental one.

You might even find that once you are eating enough to be at a healthy weight, you have more energy and your other health problems start fading away. You are still young, there is hope that this chronic fatigue doesn't have to be so chronic (being undernourished and underweight can definitely lead to similar symptoms). But you will have to learn to be happy at, minimum, 10-15 lbs more than you are now.

If it helps, Marilyn Monroe's lowest weight (she was your height) was about 115-120 lbs. Her highest was about 140.

all these replies have been really helpful so thanks a lot :]

trustwomen - your post has made me look at things quite differently. i didnt realise that women needed that percentage of body fat, i thought it was more like 15%! i have had CFS for about 9 years so i know that most of my symptoms have not come from being under-nourished, however i do agree that it would hardly help the matter.

ive been doing a LOT better this week eating up all my calories and then some. i have felt a bit happier and more energetic and i think im well on the way to gaining a good amount of fat. still struggling with feeling tubby but whenever i start to get that feeling i just remind myself ''i want my period back and i want to be healthy!'' and then i dont feel so bad. so thats a little tip that anyone else feeling like that could maybe try :) just puts things in perspective again. 

My BMI is at about 17 percent, and I don't have a period either. The doctor said my hormone levels are off and has refered me to an endrocrinologist.  Personally, I think that it's from being on a healthy diet (at least 1,200/day with adjusted levels for excercise) for about a year now.  I don' t have a sex drive either.  I do think I look great though.  I'm not gaining that weight back, so help me god.  I bought a new wardrobe that kicks ass!