Whose Schedule Comes First?

When the kids turn into teenagers, most of us turn into glorified chauffeurs and (willingly) give up our time to ferry the kids from one activity to another.  How do you fit your healthy living into that?  What do you do to stop yourself from eating while waiting for the football game to end?  How do you keep busy when swim practice is going on?  How do you fit a workout into an 8 hour soccer tourney day?

Do you schedule yourself workout time?  Do you do the workout while the kids are doing their practice? Do you travel with healthy snacks?  What's your coping strategy?

Now here's an interesting subject, which I discuss with myself ever so often What I noticed so far: my work-out time gets in the last place after kids, work, household etc. My eating on the other hand I've hardhandedly forced onto everybody in our family, as it's healthy and not bad. We practice finding or creating snacks that are responsible and yummie, and yes, we all bring them along when we're on the move.

I notice that involving the kids really works. I've now started a new strategy, where I tell them that I need to move more to become fit and to shrink - see if they'll help me get a little more space...  It's a strange thing though, it's nobody's fault really - you've had those kids and you want to support them be atheletic and play music and whatever; and by making that choice, your fastly use up your time of being awake and not working/cooking/cleaning etc. Hm. Anybody got THE solution???

This is a great topic!  Tonight, after work, I rushed home, threw on my swimsuit, drove my 9 year old to soccer at 4:45, drove 10 minutes to the pool, jumped in, did 35 minutes of laps, sat for 10 in the sun to dry off, jumped in the car(damp) and picked her up again at 6.  WHEW, crazy, but I felt so good that I fit my exercise in along with hers!  I also walk every morning, very early, before they all get up.  I have come to love that quiet morning time that belongs only to me and love that my 2.5 mile walk is my first priority, before the craziness begins!

THAT is a great idea, the morning walk! I already get up early, because I like taking my time preparing brerakfast, getting lunchbags ready and stuff, and have my own breakfast peacefully - all part of "opening" the new day, tuning in. A walk might fit it there, I'll definately give it a try.

But the rest, oh dear, sounds a bit on the stressy side for me. Coming to think of it - on Mondays it might actually work, I bring my oldest to badminton practice and there's a swimming poule right there beside her pratices. Hmmm.Might try that out as well then...

Any more great ideas out there???

My exercise is walking, so I try to fit it in during the day while kids are at school (I work from home) so I can walk the trails, but if I don't, DH and I go out on the roads after the kids are in bed, usually 9:30-10:30 or so. He just gave me a reflective vest for my birthday  It's a great time to talk and catch up on the day too.  

 Ok I have 6 kids from age 20 to age 1 , I know all about not making time for mom. BUT .... I needed to start for my own sanity and health. Im a full time hospice nurse and am on call 64 hours a week as well as the 6 little darlings 7 if you want to count the oldest child I wed. What I did is say I need to do this for myself guys or Im not going to be here. ITs not about looks its about health and being there for them. Housework dishes and other stuff will get done especially when everyone starts to help. The other day I picked up my 14 and 15 year olds at high school took both to the orthodontist while in there went and got stuff to make a fast YET heathy meal. Went back with the 4 and 1 year old in car picked up the 2 older ones after having braces tightened. Returned home started dinner got my gym clothes on droped the 14 year old off at cheerleading went the gym for 40 min  Picked up the other one who went to weight lift at the hight school with his buddy. went home and finished dinner and served it picked up and bathed the crew and soon it was time for bed. Yes you want to show your kids a healthy lifestyle but how better by showing by example.....

I agree there is no way but by example that really gets them good.  We can talk till we're blue in the face but if we don't talk the talk and walk the walk it's all fluff.  My kids are all active, skate boarding, soccer, karate, swimming and just running around the neighborhood. 

They watch me do my exercises every morning I do them right there in the living room or den.  I just started trying to eat more seafood which the rest of them won't eat but that may change because now they want to know what I'm eating and can they try it.  I've got them eating brown rice and smart taste pasta and they even try my whole wheat pasta.

It's nice to offer them options and keep them involved my kids actually ask to walk on the treadmill when they see my  husband and I using it.

By the way housework does burn calories.

Hi,

I used to work from home and now I work mostly from work.  Before my husband and I were able to do things together during the day - run, quick shopping, etc. Now, we only see each other early in the morning and then after the kids go to bed (and I am exhausted). (My husband works from home.)

He is feeling that we "don't have anything in common". I feel very torn to balance:  children (8 & 9 yr old), work, workout, diet, etc. How do I fit my husband in? Any thoughts? Now our runs are maybe Sunday - if we can find a babysitter...

Thanks.

I'm no pro at this by any means, never having been a parent, but my significant other and I recently moved in together.  He has three children aged 5, 7, and 9.  Our schedules are hectic as well, and even though we only have the kids part time he works every day that the kids are not with us, three of those work days are 24 hour shifts plus he is in the Air Force Reserve, and is gone one of the weekends a month we don't have kids.  I'm a full time student, and work part time.  While I get the opportunity during the early morning to get outside, walk with the dog, and do some yoga, our together time is severely limited.  What we do to make it work is get the kids involved.  While this slows you down a bit they certainly are active enough to get you moving and them.  It creates a healthier base for them as well, and keeps them away from the video games.  We take them on bike rides, hikes, to the park and play tag.  We, also, utilize short evening walks around the neighborhood after the kids are in bed utilizing a nanny cam that we can access on the cell phone in case a problem arises, or somebody gets up.  You could, also, try getting up an hour earlier, and making a commitment to run together in the wee hours of the morning.  These are the things that work for us, and we have a great time doing it as well as building stronger bonds with his children, and creating a healthier lifestyle for them in the process.  Good Luck!!!

This is such a great topic!! I work as a full time paramedic on 24 hr shifts.  I know it is crazy and I don't like it, but the pay off is the time off every other week (8 days!!) So when I work, I get up around 0430 and take my dog for a big walk (5-7 kms) and get ready for work when I get home.  I have a 14 yr old boy who does not play any sporting activities other golf with me and my significant other, spring, summer and fall!!  But he is getting plenty of exercise as he loves the great outdoors. He has a snowblowing business and a grass cuttting business plus he does lots of biking with his buddies. 

I prep all meals the night before so that everyone can just reach in the fridge and get what they need for that particular day.  That is what works the best for me when I am working and it keeps me in big check for caloric consumption too.  IF I had to put something together in the morn, it would be all crap.

I fit my exercise routines in during the work week, depending on whether or not I need to sleep when I get home...today has fallen apart as we had a lousy shift and I needed big sleep when I gothome...but when I did get up, I fit it all in ...ON my weeks off, I do it all when my son is at school and my SO is working and the thought is to get back to the Y and do the classes as I can run on the treadmill at home.

At the end of every day, when I am home, and with our busy lifestyles, the 3 of us come together in the hot tub and discuss school work, work and just general stuff and make a pact to do something healthy for the next day!

This is what works for the most part in our family..Good luck to all and here's to a healthy 2009!!

To be honest I almost always put my three kids schedules before my own until i started thinking if I feel this way other moms must to so I started talking to moms on my daughters b-ball team and we now all take turns with the transportation to and from practices and games. I also did the same thing with my sons activities and believe it or not it's working I now have schedule free no transportation days on MON WED and FRI and their dad is now doing SAT all of us moms benefit from this it allows us not only time to exercise but also puts us in a much better mood which allows us great family time each night with our kids and spouses. I know it might not work for everyone but it has done wonders for us moms in smalltown Indiana

I am a married dad of three teenagers. Balance - what a novel thought. To each of us that word probably means something different. For me I realized that with the hetic schedule of balancing work - family - my spouses schedule - - my personal exercise time was getting erased from the map.

When it cames to balancing everything I tried to look at the rule of negotiables and non-negotiables. Losing weight, staying healthy was a  non-negotiable to me so I had to find a way to make it a priority.

As difficult as it was at first: I moved my exercise routine from 4:30 pm to 5:00 am in the morning. I get up at 4:30 am, head to the gym, and I can get in a 10 km run and 1.5 km row before anyone else is up in the house. This has inspired my wife who now gets up an hour later and goes for her run. We still both are home by 6:45 where we get a bit of quiet time together before the house erupts @ 7:00.

There are still those days when life seem hetic and unbalanced - but i never miss my exercise routine becasue it is first thing on the scedule.

Walking is one of the best exercises. While your son/daughter is playing in a soccer tournament, walk the field. You will have the benefit of watching them play and working out at the same time. Keep healthy snacks in the car always. Eat healthy snacks often to avoid boredom eating. If your kids take a form of karate, take it with them. Don't over schedule yourself or your kids. One sport per child in my opinion. Make time for yourself and your family or you will realize your life has passed you by.

cawilder - post #7, I would hit the ball back into your husband's court by calmly going over your schedule with him and ask him what his recommendations are for finding time for just the two of you. Let him figure it out so it isn't putting more stress on you. Maybe he's willing to give up something he wants to do to accomodate your schedule so you two can do things as a couple...which as you know if VERY important. 

Our husbands/significant other need us as much as the kids do and I think we need them too so putting your heads together to work some "us" time into your schedule will most likely make both of you happy 

I wish you well 

I work from home with my husband, have an 18 year old and a 10 year old. I don't get much formal exercise in for myself, but walking the dogs, jumping on the trampoline with my youngest and swimming with them both helps keep me sane. It just doesn't happen often enough - and it doesn't quite qualify as 'me' time does it? As much as I'd love to get to gym more often, it would have to be after I get my daughter to school at 7.30am, which then also cuts into my working day, and takes away the hour I usually get the last bit of housework in. My husband runs with our German Shepherd, but I can't keep up, so my daughter and I take the two older dogs for a more gentle walk. He cycles and plays golf - when it suits him, without so much as a 'Is it okay if I ...' - the assumption always seems to be I'll be home to take care of everything else - then he still says I need to get more exercise! My daughter would love to go to gym in the evenings - but who's going to make dinner while I'm at gym - no-one! I find it frustrating that I'm expected to fit it all in with no offer of help on any front - housework, lifts, cooking etc.

Yep.....I get little to no help at home. My son does help a bit but my husband throws out the "I'm gone to work 12 hours a day". Okay, well technically I work every minute that I'm not sleeping! I go home, throw in a load of laundry, fold the last load, load the dishawasher, take car of the animals, run errands, try to sort mail and pay bills, attempt to get something NOT disgusting on the table and at least 1 night a week have a 2nd job. To get to the gym I have to get up at 4:30 am...dang hard when you can't get to bed before 11.

I'm complaining, just need to do something about it. I think a our biggest problem is that we feel guilty if we think that we are taking time away for ourselves.

Dawgya-STOP FEELING GUILTY FOR WANTING TO BE GOOD TO YOURSELF AND HEALTHY.  Its not like you are taking free time and chatting online or going to a spa or a movie, you are doing things to make you healthier and your life better.  With rare exception, I know make sure I get in 6 days of exercise a week.  I have to do it for me!  If a load of laundry does not get folded, oh well. 

I get very lil help as well but you know what, who will care what my house looks like if I am dead because i did not take care of me!

Good luck and it's always good to vent!