would this work??

so, my bmr is about 1200...with sedentary lifestyle that brings my daily burn to about 1400.

now, if i eat according to how many calories i burn in a day, would i be successful at maintaining my weight? in theory i know it would work, but has anyone tried it?

so, if i burned 400 calories at the gym i'd eat 1800 that day since I work out in the morning. whereas if i skipped my am workout then i would just eat the 1400 and call it a day. 

so, i guess it's kinda like the whole eat back your calories thing, but for someone who is trying to maintain and has done so successfully I would love to hear your perspective and take on this.

Even if you're not working out at a gym there's no way you're only getting through 1400 cals a day.   The typical adult female can maintain on 1900-2100.... just being reasonably active in an everyday sense rather than working out especially. 

I'd suggest you calculate a more reasonable average intake and go with that on a daily basis.  If you can only maintain your weight on 1400 cals a day, then you're probably too light.

Chrissy,

I've noticed your posts and first want to congratulate you on working hard on your recovery.  At the same time, I can't help but notice that your anxiety about calories (either via consumption or those burned via exercise) is running high.  Recovery from ED is not about maintaining a specific weight that is X pounds higher than when you started.  It's also about regaining a life outside of obsessing about food, eating and calories.  It seems as though your fear about gaining weight above and beyond what YOU had decided was OK for you is BIG BIG BIG.  You should be applauded for working so hard on your own to gain weight.  It's so amazing that you were able to do that.  At the same time, the tricky part of doing this on your own is that the same mind that decided that eating less and losing weight was a good idea is deciding what your maintenance weight should be.  So your poor mind is trying to juggle anxiety about gaining weight, fears about not being able to stop gaining, knowledged about what's healthy...and this is just on top of the various other concerns that undoubtedly fill your life (you're about to graduate, right?). 

So, I want to suggest that you get some support at this point in your journey.  This would be a good time to find a therapist and/or nutritionist to speak with about ALL that's going on in your life and to get some support around your path to recovery.  You're still very, very thin.  It would be so sad if you worked so hard, but still had to battle anxiety about food and calories for the duration of your life. 

Good luck.

no no no...i think i must have given the wrong impression. i currently eat a minimum of 1900 calories, and i am maintaining just fine but i also exercise quite a bit since i'm so small, only 4'11. so i was thinking about the days that i don't exercise and literally sit on my rear all day. if my bmr is 1100-1200 and i multiply that by the sedentary activity factor of 1.2 then i get roughly 1400 calories burned on absolutely sedentary days, which is quite rare. so i doubt that i'd EVER eat 1400 calories. but i was asking if theoretically it would work.

laura...i think it's NORMAL for most people, whether recovering from ED or not to worry about getting the balance right when they move to maintenance. that being said i know that it's more than a weight thing when you are truly recovered, it's regaining your life and losing the food/weight obsession. i don't know if that will ever go away but at least by asking good questions i can become less anxious about where i'm at in recovery regards to my actual weight, therefore preventing a relapse. i don't want to have things spiral out of control and then i overcompensate because i didn't prevent it from happening in the first place. does that make sense?

why is it so wrong for ME to post a question like this when others do it all the time? please don't be so judgmental and look for something WRONG with my question. it isn't unhealthy and it isn't promoting any self deprivation tactics. please if your comments aren't productive don't make them. i do my best to provide valuable feedback to individuals in addition to expressing my opinion about the content of what they are saying. so if all anyone wants to do is evaluate my question and not answer it please don't respond. i'm saying this in the most respectful and genuine way, but it might sound mean and i apologize but i honestly just want some opinions on whether this plan would be legitimate for maintaining.

would it be preferable to average my caloric needs based on my activity for the week and eat the same amount each day? or would it be better to take my burn for the day into account and eat that in addition to the 1400 i would burn sedentary??

notice how i never said that it was wrong to post your question.  i was simply expressing concern.  if that feels like a judgement to you, i can't help that. 

you're not unhealthy or abnormal for having questions.  but getting caught up in NEEDING answers can be problematic.  i was simply suggesting it might be helpful to have some space to feel anxious and to sit with uncertainty.  i was trying to acknowledge how hard it must be to be doing this on your own.  you're instinct to defend here suggests to me that there's something you're protecting...that perhaps the thought that what you're doing now is NOT absolutely healthy is something that you have a hard time being open to. see if that reminds you of other times in your journey with your ED.  what are you trying to protect here? 

if i were to place a bet, i'd say that one of the best things you can do for yourself in the path to recovery is learn how and when to LET GO of control.  not having control is not something to fear.  i'd guess you're not the type of person who is typically out of control on any front.  i'd guess that the only time in your life where you didn't have control was when you were trying so hard to control your eating and calories that eating and calories took control of you.  take a step back and see if that's still true.  if so, maybe some support would be helpful.  there's no judgement here.  just honest concern....something whihc you have also demonstrated openly for others on this site. 

Original Post by laura916:

notice how i never said that it was wrong to post your question.  i was simply expressing concern.  if that feels like a judgement to you, i can't help that. 

you're not unhealthy or abnormal for having questions.  but getting caught up in NEEDING answers can be problematic.  i was simply suggesting it might be helpful to have some space to feel anxious and to sit with uncertainty.  i was trying to acknowledge how hard it must be to be doing this on your own.  you're instinct to defend here suggests to me that there's something you're protecting...that perhaps the thought that what you're doing now is NOT absolutely healthy is something that you have a hard time being open to. see if that reminds you of other times in your journey with your ED.  what are you trying to protect here? 

if i were to place a bet, i'd say that one of the best things you can do for yourself in the path to recovery is learn how and when to LET GO of control.  not having control is not something to fear.  i'd guess you're not the type of person who is typically out of control on any front.  i'd guess that the only time in your life where you didn't have control was when you were trying so hard to control your eating and calories that eating and calories took control of you.  take a step back and see if that's still true.  if so, maybe some support would be helpful.  there's no judgement here.  just honest concern....something whihc you have also demonstrated openly for others on this site. 

thanks LAURA...i appreciate posts like this..genuine and sincere concern for another. i am worried that I am unusual i guess.

i watch myself eat and i watch those around me, unhealthy habit but i can't help it, and i see that i eat so much in comparison. i'm afraid that it's all going to hit me and i won't see it coming.

i don't want to be overweight, i don't want to be chubby, i don't want to deter potential "love prospects" because i'm unattractive. i really just want someone to care for me, and i feel like I need to make sure that i don't give them a reason to not to get to the REAL me...so i have to maintain my weight.

it is absurd and i'm aware of it but i just want someone to love me. i want to retain control of my weight i guess because it gives me a sense of certainty that if someone doesn't want me then it's something internal to me, not my appearance. maybe that's part of it, honestly i'm not sure.

i definitely agree that it would be most beneficial for me to let go of this obsession with controlling my weight, my calories, and this madness but i've been engulfed in this world that can't see past the superficial, and i've successfully achieved the thin ideal. i don't want to lose that. this might sound terrible and i apologize if it does, but isn't that what we all want? i also want to be HEALTHY though and i refuse to compromise my physical health. my mental health seems to be what's in question but that's something that requires more time which i'm sure will come. 

chrissy,

your strength and passion are so admirable. it can be really painful to get in touch with what you really want.  wanting to be loved and accepted by others--romantically or otherwise--is part of being human.  wanting that is a wonderful thing and i think can help you find a way to get some space from the obsessions around food.  connecting with other people is not about how you look; it's about being able to "show up" in the moments when you're together.  it's about leaving other concerns (e.g., how do i look, am i attractive) by the wayside in favor of being present with the person you are with.  those thoughts don't go away.  but you don't have to pay them mind every time they show up.  being a person worthy of love is not about finding a magic formula for your weight.  it's about being at a place where you can be who you are, no matter what weight, and inviting someone else to take part in that.  weight fluctuates.  that's part of life.  if connecting with others is contingent on a scale, we'd all be terribly screwed. 

if i had to guess, i'd say that wanting to be thin falls under the category of "things i can do to be accepted."  and it's an easy place to fall into obsessions, because your mind tells you you can control it.  so you focus your energy there and don't have to focus on places where you have less control--places that are scarier to think about.  i think you have to take a leap of faith that if you let go here you're not going to turn into a 2,000 lb elephant.  and the benefits of letting go, even just a little, would include having the space to love yourself no matter what weight and having the room to love other people. 

no one says any of this is easy.  and what makes you so brave is your willingness to acknowledge what you want.  the next step is to really look at your experiences and figure whether or not what you've been trying (controlling my weight) has been the route to take you there.  if it's not the right path, maybe it's time to drop the tool that isn't serving you.  it will require that you be WILLING to have fears about gaining without doing something about those fears.  just because you have the thoughts doesn't make them true.  read that sentence again.  and again.  being afraid you'll become "chubby" doesn't make you chubby and certainly doesn't make you unlovable. 

you are 100% awesome for putting your worries out there.  your struggle is what makes you human.