Work place relationships...Good or bad?

Would you, have you dated someone you work with? 

What was your experience of it, good or bad?

If you have never dated someone you work with, would you?

I have a golden rule for myself which I have never broken and that is to never get involved with anyone from work my reason are:

I have no desire to be a living soap opera for everyone else..

I would be on my guard the entire time and therefore not be myself in case they disclosed personal information (yes I have heard this at work from others)..

It may compromise my work..

What if you discover that because of the intimacy you really don't like each other...

Unfair favouritism (especially if one is in a managerial position)... I see this in my current job where they have promoted themselves to supervisor even though they don't know that actual job and they have the best shifts of any of the workers.

Should it not work, being spiteful about you behind your back to colleagues..(i see this first hand too).

I just think all in all it is a bad idea.

It can go either way...  The way life goes, work is actually where we're most likely to meet a partner.  Dismiss everyone you work with as 'out of bounds' and that's limiting your scope.   Most people I know who met at work and had a successful relationship have usually gone on to different jobs subsequently.  People I've known who've had unsuccessful relationships... yes, it can get awkard if people are childish but it's not a given.  Gossip is going to happen whether you are in a relationship or not... that's just part of being in a community.  As you've found in the past, surround yourself with secrecy and all it does is invite a different type of gossip.

I don't think it's a good idea to for managers to get involved with subordinates and stay their manager  - that's compromising.  One person I know who met his wife when he was the branch manager and she was a shop employee always jokes that he got her 'sacked'!  She actually opted to transfer to another branch and they're still very happy together.

Never say never

Not a good idea. I've done it twice. The first time it made me distracted and did not perform well at work. The second time I was involved with a manager behind the scenes, not sexually, but emotionally and everyone pretty much knew what was going on and started to spead rumours. he had a wife and kid too so it made me feel very terrible that everyone assumed we were sleeping together. I did not stay at those two jobs, and am currently having troubles again with my manager at my new place of work. It's hard to fend them off, it really is. It's difficult but its seriously not worth the distraction/gossip that goes with it!

Original Post by glowypop:

It's hard to fend them off, it really is.

Don't mean to make fun of your situation, but that's just hilarious!

I worked with Alex when we were dating and later engaged.  The only issues we had with it was when the boss would get angry at me and fault us both.  I eventually got fired for telling him he couldn't do that, and he accused me of calling him stupid.  I told him he was too cheap to afford being stupid.

Other than that, we had great self control.  We didn't let arguments at home get in the way of work.  We didn't get all huggy and kissy at work.  When we were at work we were two different people, not a couple. 

I'd love for Alex to get a job at the hospital with me now.  I miss having him nearby.  But it makes it that much more special when I finally get home and get to see him.

When I was 16, I worked at McDonald's. I wanted a cell phone sophomore year and so my mother said "McDonald's is hiring" and dropped me off. I worked there for a few months and developed a friendship with a guy who was a Jr at a different school, and was also a swing manager. He was also the area super visor's son! We started to date that summer (summer of 2003). We dated for 4 years.

I worked at McD's about 2 and half, right up until I graduated. I became a swing manager half way through my Jr year of h.s. I got a lot of crap from people saying the only reason I got promoted was because I was dating the area super visors son. She claims it was because I was a hard worker at such a young age. Him and I befriended different people at work and when we were managing the same shift, we almost "battled". We tried to out do eat other all the time. I think that made us work harder, but at work no one esp the new people had any idea we were dating.

We got into some fights over working together. I was the scheduling manager and he did truck order. One week he was on vay cay, I did truck. His own mother, said my ordering was more cost efficient, and there for took him off of truck order and added it to my task list. He did not talk to me for a week. It does put a strain on the relationship to work together. We broke up over 2 years ago, but bottom line, work place romances are never good

I am getting married in three weeks. We met at work. However, it was a movie theater, not a professional business or anything. I think if your job is your profession... it may not be a good idea... it could hurt your career. However, I was just working while in school. We've been together for 5 years and I am so glad I didnt shy away from the relationship.

I was hired at Hot Topic in our local mall when I was about 17. I was shopping there one day when the manager asked "hey you wanna work here?" Little did I know the only reason I was hired is because he thought I was hot. I was only hired on as a "seasonal" employee for christmas, apparently I was also a seasonal piece of a** because when it came time to rehire a couple seasonal employees for the rest of the year I did not get rehired because he was getting back together with his ex.

I'm wary of being friends with co workers let alone start relationshps with them.

I see work and my social life as 2 very different things, and i don't like the 2 to mix. I mean, i go out drinking with my co workers if we're having a work night out, but i don't keep in contact outside of office hours, i just don't think it's very professional. My boy sees things totally differently, he works and socialises with the same people and while it works for him due to the nature of his business, i don't think it's great for an office enviroment due to the structure of it.

I met my husband on the job.  We worked together for about a year before I changed jobs.  It was fine, but we talked about work at home too much.

I like being friends with my colleagues.  It makes going in to work every day less boring, and we share ideas and help each other out a lot.  I might be less inclined to pitch in and help out if my colleagues weren't good friends.  Also, its nice to have someone to vent to.  Some of my closest friends are people I've met at various workplaces.

I have a rule to NEVER date anyone I work with and/or train.

I broke my rule....4 times.

Regret regret regret...

like the saying goes... "don't sh** where you eat" lol.

i met my husband at work we are both in the air force as cops. he came to my flight and we flirted and started to hang out, then that moved on to a relationship. i got orders to germany and had to leave, but we stayed together and survived a long distance relationship that lasted 9 months! ( i was deployed to kuwait during those 9 months too) it was so difficult but we made it through and it made us stronger! now we are happily married for 2 years...

its a risk some take and thats what we did, i think if you have a strong connection with that person you dont even think of the bad possibilities that can happen within work. love is more important

I went out with a chef from work while I was waitressing, and it was the best thing I ever did. We've been together two years, lived together for 18 months and are now living together overseas. We have a very happy relationship.

Sure, it was a scandal for everyone else to begin with. But people do get over it. Having a never-date-a-colleague rule doesn't seem worth it to me - you could be missing out on a great person. If it hadn't worked out, I would have changed jobs - no biggie.

I work in a relatively small local airport and everyone knows every-ones business they say enough about me as it is without adding fuel to it. too many of them especially the men are quite frankly *itches too much of what they say is really nasty.

The only thing that keeps me working there are obviously there are some nice people but it's mainly the money and work conditions I get a very good wage for what I do and great holidays.

I wouldn't want to jeopardise that nor can i afford too.

Yeah, but if you happened to fall in love on the job, I'm guessing you'd change your mind.