Co-Workers/ Spouses/ Friends

 I don't care that I've tried 128,999 times before to lose weight!!  This time I've decided not to tell it to people. Let them just see the results themselves because people can be so rude!!   For example... a co-worker of mine has seen me lose weight and then gain it back, etc..  I was in the breakroom at breakfast and was having yogurt and fruit. She says to me "Are you on a diet again?"   Why would somebody say that!!??? Why?  Skinny people just don't think sometimes!! (HaHa)

My husband loves to go out to eat. He's fit and active and can afford to eat because he easily burns it off and doesn't eat the junk I eat.  Now that I'm really focused on my goal of health, I'm beginning to notice that he thinks about food a lot! If it's tuesday, he's already talking about where he would like to get take out from on friday night  or where to go out to eat saturday.   I am going to remain strong and I want to ecourage any of you out there with a spouse/significant other who loves food/going out to eat to try to compromise. I told him today that I would go wherever there was veggies/fish/fruit, etc... 

Reading your posts/comments on this site has been my support!

Anybody have similar stories they'd like to share. ?

my spouse is very supportive but my family (600 miles away) they arent supportive.  They all need to lose, not being rude, but about 60-100lbs.  Everytime I talk to one of them its "oh, how skinny are you now?" Are you still exerecising?  Im tempted to tell them next time that I stopped it all and have gained back 10lbs and dont care!  there is no telling what they will say!

stay strong and we are all here to help you along the way!!

Yeah, I'm definitely with you. I'm not telling people I'm trying to lose weight right now because usually they just make me feel dumb for it and I don't really want to make a big deal out of it. But sometimes situations still come up. Like a bunch of my girlfriends invited me to go out for ice cream with them last week, so I did. But I didn't get anything. Everyone was like, "WHY AREN'T YOU GETTING ICE CREAM?!?!?!?!? Just get some!! Everyone else is. Here we'll buy you some." Haha.... I feel that if people see someone trying to eat healthy, they should SUPPORT THEM, not try to belittle them. Maybe it's just that they're jealous. I don't know.

Good luck with your diet though. While I'm with you on not telling your friends and coworkers if you don't want to, I might tell my husband if I were in your place. He might be able to help you out by not talking about food so much and inviting you to come be active with him. I wouldn't really know though because I'm not married. :) Have fun losing weight.

My son is torn between suportive and wanting his old cookie baking, pizza ordering, let's go to the Golden Arches mom back.

My mom was up for his birthday and she didn't even notice. I never really told anyone in reallife, I just started doing it, but lately I've been getting lots of compliments at work, and many of my coworkers who also have weight issues have suddenly started seeking me out for advice.

I know what works for me, but I always feel off guard when that happens. I want to help, but I'm always afraid of comming off judgemental or something. I find it hard to explain to others what I am doing, since I don't have a specific plan (ie book or diet) I follow,  but rather just made some common sense changes and upped my activity level.

Good grief, slappy, no wonder you live 600 miles away from them! Since when is someone's weight -- absent necessary intervention or groups/sites such as this -- a decent topic of conversation?

I think I'd simply refuse to go there. The few times my mother tried to discuss my weight with me (over a decade ago), I simply ignored the comment and changed the subject.

I am lucky in that my girlfriend is very supportive. Not everyone in my actual family is, though and last time I tried to lose weight, my mother made a... less than complimentary comment and that was the straw that broke the camel's back. Four years later, I had gained it all back.

This time nothing's stopping me... but I'm REALLY glad I'm here in Fairfax with my supportive gf instead of living at home with my family.

my hubby is a sweet freak. we always have brownie mix on hand or cookies or ice cream. He has to have something sweet everynight when he gets home from work. I have learned to stay away from it(he needs to also he weights 240 and should weight about 180)

hkellick, you're in Fairfax? As in Fairfax, Virginia? If so, heck, we're almost neighbors!

Well, officially I'm probably in Chantilly... not quite sure, but the Mailing Address is Fairfax, yes :)

Where are you, athena? :)

QUITE AGREE ... I am also not telling anyone else apart from my Husband who has to cope with weighing everything he cooks me =)

I object how other people on knowing your on a diet feel it is their right to be your food guards.
"Do you really think you should be eating that ?"
"Are you sure that is good for you?"
"When I go a diet I don't ....... "

Or they obsess for you on how much weight you have lost !!!!!

ARHHHH ... =(
I know what I have eaten already today and during the week.
As I am 287 right now I my cal limit a day is higher then the stick insect in the office !!!

I didn't tell anyone until they began to notice.  I found that telling some of my friends was not such a good idea.  Three of them seem to think that my losing weight is some kind of reproach to them to do the same.  I've tried to make it clear that it has nothing to do with them.  There is skepticism when I tell them I eat at least 1300 calories a day and have not given up anything except junk food and sugar and that all I do is eat small portions of everything.  "Oh I could never lose weight if I ate that much" they all say.  I tried, once, to explain about starvation mode and all I've learned here, but I could see the doubt in their faces.  So, I've stopped talking about it.

I'm similar too I think. I try not to mention the calorie counting, especially to people like fellow students. It just......embarrasses me that I'm having to lose weight and they're not, it embarrasses me how I used to eat and how they seem to have a normal attitude to food and I don't. So it doesn't get discussed. It's not a thing that is fun to discuss with people like that.

I really like how I can just write stuff in my journal on here, especially because I figure it's more topical and private than in my blog (where I wouldn't discuss weight issues because my friends would read). My boyfriend is on this site and counting as well so that's no problem. One of my friends told me I'm being ridiculously obsessive but her diet history is as messy as mine so I don't take it to heart. And I told my parents as a side comment, but I know I won't want to discuss it much. When I go home, I think I'll just have to have a cheat week (lalala....).  

My problem is that if something is on my mind, I'll talk about it. I'm quite a chatty person and all. Oh well. I would LOVE to lose enough weight for people to ask me for advice.

I did tell people until I could no longer refuse the food that was around. When I lived at home, my mom is addicted to food the way I was, and always has something unhealthy in the house. It's useless to try and get her to not buy it, and impossible to refuse eating it. So I moved out. Now that I'm on my own, I tell her what I'm doing, and how I'm eating. I've also shared with her how much weight I've lost. She's supportive for the most part, but doesn't seem to quite understand what I'm doing. Everytime I go home for the weekend there's something there that I wouldn't normally allow myself to eat, but I've allowed it once a week.

I really worry about her too, she's overweight, and always talks about losing weight, always coming up with scheme or something to do it too, but never sticking to it.

I recently was talking to my girlfriend about weight loss. Her husband is about 100lbs overweight and she's worried about him because of the way he eats. I suggested she come to this site and post, and she might start counting calories for herself as well.

This place truly is a gift straight from GOD in my opinion. Great friends, good information, and more importantly people who I can talk to about my diet with total acceptance and no fear.

You guys make this place!

I didn't mention that I was trying to lose weight at all for quite a while.  Or rather, I mentioned that I wanted to, had someone recommend this site and then I didn't mention it again until just recently (a few months later).  Now I don't talk about it much, but I do mention it.  Another friend of mine is trying to get a handle on her weight so we've discussed it a bit.  I've mentioned it to my mom but I think she's concerned about eating disorders, which is odd since neither I nor my sister have had any issues with that.  I have this feeling that she really believes I'm at a good weight and I love her for that, but I know I need to lose weight for health reasons.

Ya know what made me really start talking about it?  Dropping a pants size.  And a bathing suit size.  Nothing like success to make you want to share.

I didn't tell anyone I was trying to lose weight other than my husband and my mom. My sister in law noticed I had lost weight (only 10lbs at the time) so I confessed to her.
Just yesterday my mom had me turn around cause she noticed I'd lost weight. We'd seen each other nearly every day until recently so I didn't think she'd ever be able to tell but yay!
I'm getting closer to 25lbs lost now and I keep waiting for someone else to notice (ie. my own freakin' sister!) and when someone finally asks, "Have you lost weight?" I think I may just yell, "Well it's about freakin time you noticed! ;)"

My husband and I both like to go out to eat but now we're trying to go places that have healthier options cause he's trying to be healthier too. (tried to get him to log his food just to keep track of things like sodium and cholesterol but it didn't work) Now he asks me, "How are your calories today?" before he suggests getting a treat or eating out :)

hkellick, I'm on the other side of the river. Soon to be in it if it keeps raining the way it has been! :-D

~~~

I haven't told anyone except my fiance, my son, and my best friend that I'm trying to lose weight. I hate it when people comment on my weight -- not that people usually do -- and I certainly don't want to encourage people to start doing so.

I never wanted to tell anyone. I told my parents because they do the grocery shopping - but we're very close so that's fine.

I didn't want to tell my friends, but one night a friend of mine came over to watch videos and she brought along two family sized blocks of chocolate. I had to explain that I didn't want to eat any, and she realised immediately that something was up - she said she couldn't understand "this whole dieting thing", and she made some muttered comments. Then, of course, she tried to offer her advice on the subject and how to exercise, when I don't think she's exercised in the last three years. Argh.

I had a debating tournament this past weekend, and constantly had to withstand a f**king interrogation as to why I didn't want to drink Coke or shovel chips down my throat. I do not wish to poison myself anymore! Why is that everybody else's business?!

I'm sorry for swearing, but I wish people would just leave me alone! I'm considering telling them that I'm allergic to refined sugar!

Sheesh, i tell ya, people can have their hearts in the right place but have their feet in their mouths!

Most of my friends and colleagues were great about me being overweight, they'd always reassure me that I didn't need to lose any weight and looked great... but then look at me funny when I ordered chips...  but I forgave them for that, cos it's human nature.

Now that I'm losing weight, they're all really concerned - tut-tutting me for not eating enough and telling me I look pasty and tired!  Nice!  I reckon most of it is just a small amount of jealousy slipping out... when people see someone succeeding in something so hard, it's hard not to react... even if in their hearts they are happy for me.

I just wish I could get one message, not 10... Don't look at me like a fatty then tell me I'm not eating enough when I diet!  I'll get a complex or something!

Although I must admit people are coming round now that the weight-loss is more noticable... I've even managed to get a few colleagues to join my gym!  :-)

Tat- I know what you mean! My husband is a sweet freak too. My first trip to the grocery store for my first load of healthy food....and he's got to get 2 bags of 1lb M&M's because they're "buy one get one free".  I know where his place is where he hides his goodies. He also loves to jump in the car and go to Dairy Queen to get ice-cream. For some reason, he doesn't ever want my sugar-free, reduced everything ice-cream!

Zoe and Walkingbriskly- I also hate it when people (mostly at work) have to comment on my food. They will peer at my lunch, ask me a question about it or make a statement like..."Having a hamburger today?" So annoying!!!  I came up with a name for them....the Food Police!  And they're always on patrol!! HaHa!