worried about university

Hi all,

i've been doing well so far with my weight gain as i'm up from 94pounds to 96. however, i'm not too sure whether this is actualy not very good-going at all because obviously there is water-weight/ food-weight to factor in so maybe i haven't gained anything... time will tell.

i've slowly been working up from 2000 to 3000 calories with the help of complan [uk ensure type thing].

i'm quite worried though because a week this sunday [20th] i will be moving many many miles from home to university... and although i think mentally i'm stronger than ever in recovering from ed i'm still apprehensive about whether the chaotic lifestyle of uni will disrupt my progress.

on the other hand it might help because my mind will be elsewhere/ on studies/ going out even more than i do etcetc?

the family support/food over-looking is also gone and no more trips to the same old nutritionist hmmm.

also, im still VERY skinny. 96pounds and 5ft8. people at uni are going to take one look at me and say 'anorexic'. should i tell people?!

any advice from anyone that's moved away/to uni would be appreciated.

jojox

I am older now 31 but I know it is hard with transitions and the unknown. I have had my ed on and off since I was 16. First I want to encourage you to think of all you will miss out on if you get sick again with the ed. It will take away from social fun,possibly have to drop out of school,and of course number 1 health damage. There will be hard days and better days and using the coping skills to get through the hard is key. Is there a way you can get treatment from your school with a therapist/nutritionist? I think preplanning your meals and snacks in the transition for sure. Can you still call your family and get support? I have always been honest with people about my recovery. For the most part people have been understanding. I think it is better then the whisper and wonder by people. Everyone struggles in life at times and a true friend will be there through good and bad. You can do this. A little side note I just moved out of state and I reminded myself that being homesick and getting used to environment that is new takes time. So to take one day at a time and expect to feel a mix of emotions.

Hello.

I've been away to Uni, although I didn't have an ED at the time. I can't really say that it won't disrupt you, because it will. The lifestyle change is massive. But what I will say is that going to Uni is excellent motivation to recover: your studies and social life will be 100% better once you're at a healthy weight.

The difficulty with life at University is that it is so disorganised. You won't be able to skip meals like other students do, because you're sick and need to get better! I agree that pre-planning is needed here. Are you going to be catered or self-catered? You might want to think about what you'll eat each day to meet your calorie goals.

Are you in the UK? If so, I think most UK University have an eating disorder support service there.

Best of luck!

well, I went to uni last year at exactly your height and weight, and no-one SAID anything to me so I didn't have to tell them. people can be quite tactful, so you can leave it until you know them better if that make you more comfortable.

however, I left a few months later having lost a lot more weight, not saying you will but I'd caution you to take care and seek support because moving away and dealing with the uncertainty around food and so many things changing can be really difficult. be mindful, get help from the local NHS or the uni counselling services, and keep making your recovery a priority alongside having fun. I hope it turns out ok for you :)

try not to worry to much about this. you need to go and try to do exactly the same thing as you are doing, like innocent eyes said make the most of all the help available to you. hopefully being in an enviroment with young people will make you feel more relaxed about what you are doing as you will see it is normal to eat . you can do it lol.i wouldnt mention it to any fellow student as i think it may cause you to worry more but as you get to know indivdual people you may feel able to talk to them like abbi said true friends will stick by you and help you through h x

I went to university at a very similar BMI to yours and in hindsight it was much too soon. If you don't feel ready, don't go. It is much better use of your time to take a semester or year off from university in order to really progress with your recovery than to go to university too soon and not do well in either your studies or your recovery.

Wishing you all the best :)

yes mtheres always that meryl is right , if you dont feel ready to go , dont go , your health is more important, there is plenty of time for uni when you are feeling a bit better h x

Hi,

thankyou for all your replies. they really helped me.

i've enquired about therapist/nutritionist at the university... they have them so i'm going to enrol straight away when i get there so that I can keep that support.

i'm self-catered so i can pre-plan meals. although that's not something i've ever done before. my dietician/GP have given me various meal plans but only rough outlines [obviously have to have 2500 minimum per day though].

i'm not 100% sure i am ready to go to university to be honest. but staying at home is not an option as my family do not want to see me 'wasting my life' at home because of the 'illness'. it's abit of an insensitive attitude for them to have but i understand they just want me to get on and 'forget' about my ed. if only it were that simple...

with no jobs around due to recession etc it's impossible for me to show i am not just being lazy by not going to uni and so i would have nowhere to live? no income, no anything.

anyway, i'm 80% certain that uni will be fun and challenging and i'll be able to maintain my gaining. my main concern atm is that i'm not gaining sufficiently [1-2 pounds a week at most] on 2750cals and to go over 3000cals a day whilst being at uni too would be VERY hard for me to do 'alone'.

hmmm.

jojox