Wrong frame of mind...

Ok so lately my parents have been telling me to stop counting calories and just eat what I want, when I want...and the idea of that scares me to death.

I have been eating healthy and exercising since January, and have lost about 40 pounds.. I was hoping to lose a little more but I've really toned up a lot so it's ok =).

For the longest time I didn't count calories, and I lost weight very slowly.  Then I started counting calories and realized some days I didn't eat near enough and some days I ate too much.  After that I pretty much became addicted to calorie counting. I feel like if I were to go back to not counting, I would gain everything back and here's why...

I've realized that when I eat, I only think about the calories, not how my body feels or anything.  For example, this morning I made oatmeal and cottage cheese and when I was eating it I didn't feel hungry, but I kept eating anyways just thinking, "it's ok, I can fit it into my calories..." or "I'm full but I'm going to keep eating because I can"

Since that is my attitude towards food and eating, I don't enjoy food anymore, I just see it as calories.  I feel like if I stopped counting I wouldn't know how to listen to my body anymore because I'm so used to just eating based on calorie amount and not by how my body feels. Plus since I have been eating only low calorie foods, I'm used to feeling full so if I went back to other food I would eat those until I was full out of habit.

I'd really like to stop counting calories to be honest, and just go by eating every little while and eating healthy, because also, when I count calories, I have the hardest time hitting 1200. I get nervous as soon as I start approaching it.  Like, so far today I've eaten 950 and I feel like I should stop, but I know I need to eat more.  I haven't even exercised yet so I actually need to eat quite a bit more, but I'm just not hungry right now either because I filled up on low cal stuff earlier. 

I don't know, this was basically a rant type thing...just needed to get it out =). I know it was really scattered and random, sorry about that! It's really hard for me to organize this one...

Any support or suggestions, thoughts, or ideas are welcome though =)

deflepfan16

i know exactly how you feel. you're not alone. sorry this post isn't more constructive.

my mom tells me to stop calorie counting too. but i'm so afraid of weight gain..i don't know if i'll ever be able to stop.

Oh no that's fine, it's good to know I'm not alone =)

I was a little nervous talking about it

I had to give up counting per a nutritionist's order.

At first I was scared as hell, but now I realize it was the best thing I ever did. 

I am scared to death and I don't know how on earth it would not make me gain weight or how I could do it...I just count automatically

You take a plate, fill it with 1/3 protein, 1/3 complex carbs (rice, beans, sweet potato etc) and the other third with veggies and it'll be difficult to gain weight. Also eat small snacks (eg an Apple or a handful of nuts) between breakfast and lunch and between lunch and dinner.

Also recognize that every so often you can cheat and get away with it. And keep exercising. 

There's no way I could give up counting and exercise..EVER lol

That's a good idea though, I'll have to try it.

It's just the hardest thing to start stopping... lol

It was pretty easy for me to stop counting. Although admittedly I lost more weight at first because I was afraid to eat enough. After a few days I went all out by throwing olive oil or PB on almost everything. Even then it wasn't enough and I was down 10 lbs within 2 months, so I had to eat even more.

I wouldn't mind being down another 10 lbs, that was actually my goal but I kind of gave up on it cause I've been at a plateau for a while, so I thought my body just didn't want to drop those last 10.  Maybe if I do that I'll drop em too...lol.  

First off, there is absolutely nothing wrong with this:

"For the longest time I didn't count calories, and I lost weight very slowly. ...and realized some days I didn't eat near enough and some days I ate too much...."

That's your body self-regulating.  It's perfectly normal and it's perfectly ok.  We're not designed to eat exactly the same number of calories every single day!  But our body will even itself out if it's low or lacking something. 

And losing weight slowly is the best way to do it! 

There's a book you might find interesting.  "Intuitive Eating" by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch.  It talks all about this. 

Oh that makes sense.

And thank you, I'll be sure to check that out =D

I think this is definitely a common problem that many people can encounter on a site like this.  The focus is on counting the calories you eat per day and sticking within your range.

When I'm at college it's very easy to count calories, the 'real' food I eat is pretty easy to calculate (bread, turkey, salads, etc) but when I go home, or rather to my boyfriend's house, he and his father cook the meals, adding butter here and there, grilling foods I can't calculate very well, and making all sorts of carby sides.  However, I managed my second summer at that house, and this time much more successfully!  I did not count my calories.  However, because I have been counting for so long, it's gotten a lot easier for me to guestimate the foods.  Any carby side they served, I ate just a small portion of it, if the main course was grilled fish or chicken of sorts, I ate a nice portion-size of it, and the grilled veggies I loaded up on!

Basically, you're at the point where you have your basic eating habits down.  switching from calorie counting to not counting will be fairly 'simple' in some ways now.  You know that if you continue eating approximately the way you are now, you'll be well within your calorie range.  Or, if it makes you feel better starting out, eat through the day without counting and then come online and log it in and see how you did.  If you notice you've been hitting your goal, then you're okay.  For me, after this week (gotta make up for my abundance of eating last week haha) I will be weaning myself off calorie counting, mainly doing so on weekends or days when I plan on allowing myself a snack--I want to make sure I don't go overboard

Goodluck to ya!

Yeah... I find myself in a similar predicament. I don't know if I'm quite that hardcore (because I love food and coming up with low cal recipes), but half the time anyway it's almost like I'm just putting numbers into my body instead of nutrients. Or like if my %age of fat in my diet on a particular day turned out slightly higher than my protein, I feel completely obligated to add some protein regardless of how minuscule the %age was. It really is addictive...

For the longest time I didn't count calories, and I lost weight very slowly.  Then I started counting calories and realized some days I didn't eat near enough and some days I ate too much.  After that I pretty much became addicted to calorie counting. I feel like if I were to go back to not counting, I would gain everything back and here's why...

I've realized that when I eat, I only think about the calories, not how my body feels or anything.  For example, this morning I made oatmeal and cottage cheese and when I was eating it I didn't feel hungry, but I kept eating anyways just thinking, "it's ok, I can fit it into my calories..." or "I'm full but I'm going to keep eating because I can"

As far as the second paragraph goes I can TOTALLY identify. I hate thinking of a handful of grapes as '20 calories worth' or knowing how many calories is in every forkful I put into my mouth. And about the last sentence, that sort of thinking has gotten me into a lot of trouble and is pretty much to blame for my extremely unhealthy relationship with food.

The 1st paragraph, however--I find I'm kinda the opposite of that. Before I started counting calories, I was probably eating the right amount for my activity level--1600-1800. And then I stopped eating sweets and junk, and was right around 1400-1500, which was probably the best for me to be at for weight loss. Starting to calorie-count totally screwed me up. I thought of calories as "bad" for some reason--the more something had, the worse it was for me [which, as I've come to learn, is absolutely untrue]. I think that as long as I watch what I eat, and eat when I'm hungry, I'll probably be fine.. but alas, it's hard to stop counting when you know how many calories are in every single thing :/ I really want to stop too.. I even stopped exercising just so I wouldn't have to factor that in to make sure I'm eating enough. I'm so ready to get everything back on track and I wish you the absolute best as well.

Wow that's like, exactly how I am.  I see calories as bad...I really watch everything I eat and always go for the low cal stuff.  I would love to do an intuitive eating type thing but it just makes me super nervous...

I do the exact same thing!! I keep track of everything I eat in my head as Im eating it! And it makes me think and obsess about food a lot more than I really need to. Sometimes I'll eat something if I can afford to eat it when Im low in cals for the day... even if I don't know if I really want it! Sometimes I don't even know what I really want anymore! And sometimes I feel like I just binge compulsively!

Original Post by deflepfan16:

Wow that's like, exactly how I am. I see calories as bad...I really watch everything I eat and always go for the low cal stuff. I would love to do an intuitive eating type thing but it just makes me super nervous...

 Yeah... starting today, I'm trying to go for the whole intuitive eating thing.. absolutely terrified! Somehow I've got it in my head that I'll wake up superfat tomorrow. I know that's not gonna happen. But I mean, I've been counting calories for quite a while now and I really don't wanna spend my ENTIRE life obsessing about those evil numbers going into my body and actually enjoy stuff. I'm atleast going to try to keep this up for a whole so I'll let ya know how it goes...

I keep telling myself, Ok I'll start tomorrow...then tomorrow comes and I start counting again =\

I just started thinking about it more today though...I mean it's like, if I gain a few pounds trying this out or trying to find about how much I should eat, it's not like I don't know how to lose them!

It might not be fun to lose them again but at least I'll know for sure that I'm not missing out on how much I COULD be enjoying food instead of worrying about it, and how much I could be eating.  You know? 

That's hard to explain lol but it's like, I could either keep eating this little and worrying about food, or I could see if I could eat more and not worry and still not gain weight.  If it turns out I have to eat like this to not gain, I'll just switch back...but at least I'll know I'm not missing out on better things.  It's worth a try in my opinion!

Yeah.. been trying for 3 days now. While I haven't entered anything into cc.com, I keep trying to eyeball things and doing the math in my head. It's tough. And by not having exact numbers, I've only been eating freakishly healthy low fat foods. But I guess since it's only be a few days that's to be expected... I guess we'll see where this takes me over a longer period of time..

Tini87, keep us updated! I'm in the same boat as you trying to quit counting calories. I'm having such a hard time trying to stop. I quit entering it on the computer and I'm not writing it down, but I'm still doing it all in my head. I tried to eyeball food instead of measuring, and haven't been very good at it. I still grab my measuring cups. I just want to make sure I'm eating enough. I started working out at the gym, so I need more calories, but I'm still scared as hell to up them!