Have you've ever been to an OverEaters Meeting?

Ok, out of obligation I went to an OverEaters meeting with my friend, being told and knowing that I AM NOT AN OVEREATER by my spouse and son statements.  This is through their observation NOT my Insistance.

This is how the meeting went, Formatted to say at each time a person spoke, Hi, I am  . . . and I am an overeater.  To participate I told them I didn't feel I fell in the category but wanted to see what it was all about and also to see if I COULD be in that category.  I don't think they appreciated my comments, but hey . . . I am me and that is that! 

I spoke of my weight, my loss,  the period of time it took me to loose and the MOTIVATIONAL BOOK I READ THAT HELPED ME IDENTIFY I was a emotional eater. Hence, maybe hiniting that I could be an OverEater. But the fact the book "Life is Hard, Eating is Easy" gave me the hindsight to know what I am doing and I recognize it and don't eat it before I ask myself several questions through statements.  Like "How much do I want that on a scale of 1-10; 10 being the highest. If it is between 6-10 then have it other wise, below that number ask myself "why, is it a need, a want and then what is my emotions at the time. 

I found during the meeting though this is not what they wanted to hear!  They want someone to ONLY LISTEN TO THEIR FEELINGS NOT OFFER SUGGESTIONS< BECAUSE THEY KNOW IT ALL!  They know it all because they went down the path of reading books like me.

So in your opinion, have I just not reached their point of not being able to help myself without their type of support.  You see, my diet support group. TOPS. has games we play. One of them is the 7 SINFUL INDULGENCES.  You write down 7 foods that you crave or know you shouldn't have, then at the next meeting a number 1-7 is drawn ; if you have had that food corresponding to the number that was drawn then you owe a quarter.  I think this game is self-identification and suits the same purpose as the OverEaters group.  Do you think the same way as me?

Well, I am not sure what else to comment on.  I don' t think I will go to another meeting unless any of you OA members know of anything that would encourage me to go to another meeting. I really didn't feel comfortable at the first one.

Take care and thanks for your input.

God Bless.

Is this in the right Forum?  If it needs to be changed please do so.

Thanks.

No one here has ever had an experience with OA?

Hi. I have been to OA meetings. I was a recovering anorexic at the time but the ip place I went to was a 12 step program with all suffers and they encouraged OA meeting. Anyhow OA vs like ANAD,EDA are a little different. OA they don't want cooments so to speak from others. It is more the perosn getting their feelings out. Then after one can go up to that person and say how they relate or support that person. The eda for ex is more with comments so on. What works for one may not for another. In any instance two of the same type of meeting may run very different depending on group etc. Maybe look into eda meetings in your area. Regardless of the name you want to give it if you feel that food is something you use in a negative way or it controls you it may help to have support and find ways to cope. Hang in there

I believe you can make problems worse by over-analysing them and by dwelling on them for too long.  That applies to a lot of problems... there's a time for introspection and coal-raking and there's a time to put things behind you and move on.  Reprising the problem over and over again might be pleasurable in a self-indulgent kind of way but it risks never getting to that next stage... .. a solution. 

I'm not convinced about any game called '7 sinful indulgences'.... so much twisted behaviour around food comes precisely from the idea that there are 'sinful' or 'bad' foods that are to be avoided, to feel guilty about and which are subsequently idolised as 'forbidden pleasures'.  Fining people for enjoying a biscuit?   I don't think that's helping anyone develop a healthy relationship with food. 

gi-jane:  The whole point of the game is to help people elimate what they consider are trigger foods for them.  It has worked so I don't think it is all that bad in adding motivation to people who need to identify what foods are bad.  We are giving those foods that we discuss to a local food pantry when we decide to totally give them up.  They must be new and unopened.

When I have been on diets that required me to eliminate foods (healthy or not) I always follow the same pattern:

1. Follow the rules diligently.
2. Lose weight rapidly at first
   
3. Get close to a healthier weight slowly
4. Get bored with the diet/miss dreadfully the forbidden foods
5. Start following the plan less diligently/add in the forbidden foods
6. Fall completely off the plan, return to old habits that cause me to gain weight slowly (about 5 pounds/year)

So, I agree with GI-jane, these kinds of games are counter-productive to me.

At my age (51) I vowed to never again make a change in my diet that I couldn't envision maintaining for the rest of my life.  I only add excercise that I actually enjoy, I eat whole  real foods I enjoy, I check in to see if I am full/satisfied, I track calories and excercise diligently, I plan for eating situations where I tend to over-indulge, and I am not a slave to the scale or in any hurry to reach my goal weight so the occasional indulgence (I call them Special Treats) are thouroughly enjoyable and don't lead to guilt.  I can see myself doing all these things for the rest of my life. 

Good luck finding out what works for you, because it is completely different for all of us!